Soccer Player????

I don't mean to be partial to Landon these days - but I got home from running on Saturday and Richard had dressed the boys. As soon as I walk in the door Landon comes trucking in to see me and he has this outfit on! Just so adorable!!!! Maybe he will be my soccer player. :) (although Carson is proving to be much more agile) But either way - this little outfit was so cute to me.

This week Richard has mold training class down in Denver! He will be gone very long days. But on the upside - I have the car all week! I plan to stay busy, go out, and enjoy the week. It helps that it's been planned so my mind is anticipating it! (my running will be hard to get in this week though). But overall we are

Choosing to

ENJOY!

this week.

Enjoy the sun,

Enjoy the boys

Enjoy Creation

Enjoy new friends

Enjoy new playdates

Enjoy God's word!

Enjoy the car (ha:) )

I pray that each of you will choose to enjoy your day! Choose to be thankful for God's love to us! Choose to relish in his goodness. And above all worship God in the mundane of life!

He's alright

My sweet, sweet Landon! I love him with all my heart!

Thank you everyone for praying for us so much the last few weeks during this time of getting Landon "evaluated" based on his speech.
Landon is 17 Months old! his speech has not improved really since he's been about 10 months old, and he shows no sign of desiring to communicate with us in any way except for whining and grunting. No matter how much I felt like he should be, or how much emphasis I put on it.
So we took the necessary steps to get him evaluated (per our doctor's recommendation) and I last posted here regarding our decision.

This past week we had his "final" evaluation to see if he does actually qualify for some type of Speech Therapy and to make sure his hearing and vision was ok. Thankfully his hearing and vision are fine, which I was not surprised by, I was not worried in those areas at all.
As far as his speech, he is at about a 9 month old baby's level and that is even taking into consideration the fact that he was 6 weeks early.
The ladies that "evaluated" him were wonderful. There was about 5 professionals, all in different areas of early development, and they did great with him. To start off they were very very impressed with his cognitive, gross and fine motor skills, and social development. He did some things that developmentally a 17 month old should not be doing yet, as far as stacking things in the right size order or matching shapes and putting them in correct holes. They were very impressed with that.
I was wondering about his social development too - b/c he is so timid and hesitant. but they said that was really fine and nothing to worry about, just a little more shy and laid back.
As far as his speech - he does need some help. The told me that his constant drooling that gets worse if he is active is b/c those muscles around his mouth haven't been "awakened" yet. They gave me some tips on how to do that. They were also very helpful about showing me different ways or tactics to try to get him to understand he needs to try to start imitating, communicating, and responding to me! That was all very helpful.

And moving forward - and speech therapist will be coming to my house about once a week at first and depending on how he responds it might lessen. Then in 6 months we will reevaluate to see if we reached his goals we set (at the evaluation) and if he still needs further assistance.

I struggle with this - b/c so many people will respond to me by saying -"oh doctors just want all the kids to fit into a chart/timeline and kids just don't grow like that." Or "he's fine, my child didn't speak until he was 2 and then he was fine". or "don't stress, by my 6th I didn't worry anymore and they all turn out fine". And although I will always struggle when I'm told these things, mostly b/c I want everyone to think I'm the Best Mother Ever; (being completely honest), it comes down to Richard and I as Landon's parents, knowing him best, and doing what we think is best for our child in this situation. It is not going to hurt him in any way, and why not help him in this area of communication if we have the resources and availability so that he doesn't get more behind.
I mentioned these things that everyone responds to me with to the professionals that I met with - and they were very reassuring that I was doing the right thing. They also said that when they see 3 or 4 year olds with a delay at that age they wish so bad the parents would've brought them in earlier b/c it is much easier to correct.
So overall - this is our decision and our choice. We believe we are doing what is best for Landon. and frankly I'm tired of hearing the whining and grunting at me to get my attention and I don't know what else to do to help him start using his babbles.
I will hopefully keep you all posted on the outcome and how everything goes. Thank you again for so much support and prayers and encouragement that we have received during this time! It means a lot to us that our friends and family care so much about us.

But for now

Landon we love you 

with all our hearts!

These pictures, my friends,

are so so small to you all

but huge to me.

Carson is active; very agile and athletic and coordinated. I love that about him.

- But coloring or painting is not necessarily his strong suit. It's easy for me to compare to what other kids are doing or get frustrated with him when he begs to color but then spends the entire time taking the crayons out of the box and throwing them all over the room. Coloring is almost a dreaded activity for me b/c I get frustrated!

I have bought him water colors and we have tried this avenue a few times - he has always gotten disinterested very quickly. But this day - for some reason - he was having so much fun coloring in the fishes that I had outlined for him. (please excuse my terrible drawing - I know from whom he gets his "non-crafty/creative" mind) But he spent a good chunk of time actually coloring in the pictures and wanting me to draw more - instead of eating the paint brushes or splatting water all across the room. 

MILESTONES - that's what we're talking about!

Blue Monday

I just read that today - Jan 23, 2012 is considered the most depressing day of the year! I'm glad I have an explanation for how I'm feeling today. ha

My heart if full of many things to say - but no words to say them. I'm struggling with how exactly to put things down - b/c I've been mis-took so many times after I've written from the heart. (which I know is one of the dangers of blogging, but you know, whether you're in person, or texting, or email or phone convo - this is a danger)

My desire with this blog is to document our life - but more importantly I want so much for Christ to shine through. I want Him to be glorified in the mundane of life. I want people to see that there is joy in life because God loves us and chose me to live with him, and to help further his kingdom in his BIG STORY for this world! I am a part of it! 

Motherhood (or really LIFE in general) is not easy! there are hard days, lonely days, and frustrating days, and "feeling guilty" days.  But what greater joy and blessing than to have children and see them grow, to nurture them, and care for all their needs. 

I have been convicted recently on my "tone" or "anger" towards my boys. How often to do I respond in frustration b/c of something else being dumped out, or thrown across the room, or ripped apart - when I could respond with Gentleness!!!! How many times do I say "no" to them or give them a negative command - and don't have positive feedback or give them positive attention.

This all happened within 5 min of
dinner trying to be prepared

Many days I go to sleep "feeling guilty" for the tone I used so often during the day. I wish i could go back and change it - but the next day it starts all over again. 

This is where I hope people can see God's grace being poured out on me! I'm not perfect, I fail so many times throughout the day - but God loves me, He loves my children, and He is pouring Grace on my life teaching me and showing me areas I need to concentrate on to be more like Him!

Even in the mundane of park days, or laundry days, or discipline questions, or seeking wisdom for decisions for you kids, or life altering decisions like moving -  WE ARE BLESSED beyond measure already because of Christ who died in our place and forgave us our sins if we have FAITH in him!


The passage below is my prayer for myself and for you as fellow mothers (and I really do pray for a lot of you especially if you have asked me, or I know your situation! It's how I feel connected to friends while I stay at home with no car!) I think of you mother/friends often throughout my day.
Let us strive for our lives to be a light to our children and our neighbors and the world around - that we love them and that Christ loves for them shines through us!

And also importantly

I hope we ENJOY our lives!!!!!!!

Ephesians 3: 14-21

14For this reason I kneel before the Father, 

¹⁵ from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. 

¹⁶ I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 

¹⁷ so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 

¹⁸ may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 

¹⁹ and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

 ²⁰ Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 

²¹ to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

What a day!

Today has been a great day! Some days are just great. I'm filled with joy and I love my life. (believe me for as many days like today as there is, there are plenty of days that are not like this). And as a side note: I'm striving to not let either feeling determine how I treat my family because of the truth of God's saving Grace in my life!

And in the life of a 

2 year old boy!

 Nothing could be more exciting.

The day started with an early 6 am run. Compared to the single digit degrees I had been running in - the 45 degree weather today was enough in and of itself to make it a better day.

I got home and had to run to the grocery store to get a couple ingredients b/c at our Life Group tonight we are having a meal - and the meal is Breakfast food! Now could it get any better than that??!!? I would venture to say no. anyways - I had to get some ingredients for the dish i want to take tonight -

 So I surprised

 all the boys with bringing home 

Donuts!!!! 

Now that is a good morning.

Because - Why NOT??!!?

Later in the Morning we went to the park - which happens to be located right next to a fire station. Carson saw a fire truck pulling into the station and ran over to watch. I tried to make him stand back and "not bother" them b/c I know they are probably busy about their responsibilities. When it got into the building I told Carson to walk away and we started heading back to the park area. But one of the Fire man came around and called us back in. So I ran and got Landon and we had a tour of the fire truck! It was the coolest thing. I was amazed.

They were wonderful to him! The fireman let him sit in the driver's seat, he turned on the truck and showed him all the lights and showed him the hose and everything! it was so cool!!! They brought hats to my two boys and stickers, and a coloring book and pencils.!!!!
I was an ecstatic mother; thinking "this is so cool, and so wonderful, and so nice!"
Carson was a little hesitant and a little shy and uneasy- but he sat there fine. He won't stop talking about it now and wearing the hat!

Of course of all the days I had forgotten my camera. I said something about wishing I could take a picture - and another fireman took out his phone and took a pic for me and sent it to me! They were wonderful!!!!!  I only have one picture of the event! But boy! 

I will remember it for a 

while and the boys will too! 

unedited version!

playing with the editing

Now I know though - take a shower and change out of your running clothes before you go to the park - you never know when something monumental will be cataloged!

woops!

First of all i need to say thank you to everyone who has been so encouraging to me since my last post. between phone calls, texts, emails, comments and people talking to me - everyone has been so encouraging. I will almost feel bad if nothing is wrong b/c I had so many people praying for me. :) It's so wonderful to know that I have such caring friends all over the place. (and that you guys actually read my blog ha)

Second of all - I feel really dumb! Yes, Dumb. I can't say that I've ever done something like this to this extent. I had "the entire world" (practically) praying for me today. and I messed up. haha - it's funny i think.

I started my day out meeting my cool new running friends, in terribly windy conditions, and if I was to run by myself there is no way I would've made it out, so I'm thankful to have running friends. WE finished our 4 mile loop and I rush home, shower and got dressed up. B/c this is the day i get the car and I'm going out! Which for me lately this winter is a big deal. ha. I have a wonderful wonderful husband who not only made myself and himself "eggs in a basket" but also dressed himself, finished making his lunch (b/c I didn't have to time to finish it) and dressed both boys!!!! WOW! That's amazing. We loaded everyone up, and took him to work by 9. Then I had to run by the bank and the post office to run some errands.  Then it was off to the big "EVALUATION" for Landon.

Something in my head starts questioning what the date actually is. I vaguely remember writing something about the 20something of Jan. So I look at my phone to see what the date is. It's only the 18th! then I look at the paper with the reminder on it, and it actually says my appointment is on the 25th!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Who would've thought I would convince myself and the entire world that my appointment was this week, when in fact IT'S NEXT WEEK!!!!
So all that work of getting out of the house, and asking everyone to pray and fretting and we get to all do it again next week!

I did think - well it's a good thing it didn't happen the other way around! Like it was today and I was thinking it was next week. Then we would be up a creek!
So - more on all this next week!

Sweet Landon

I haven't posted about this on my blog yet (although i've talked to many people about it) and mostly I haven't because I know what everyone will say. But now I actually think it would make me feel better to hear other's stories or opinions. :)

Landon is 16 months old. He has not really said anything at all. And probably just within the last week has he even showed any signs of repeating syllables that go along with a word. You know those ASQ's you fill out at the doctor's office for their well baby check ups. Well at a year old Landon wasn't saying 3-4 words like "they" want them to at that age. I showed some concern to the doctor mentioning that I see no real Desire even in landon in coming close to even forming words. He gave me some "techniques" to use to maybe force landon to start speaking. Such as, repeating "cup" or "please" or "ball" to him multiple times instead of just giving him what I knew "uh, uh" meant. (since I'm the mother I've had no problem in discerning whether that "uh, uh" means I'm full, I'm thirsty, I would like to get down, or carson took my blanket". :) ) 

So for the next 3 months I really worked on being intentional with him regarding this issue. the 15 month check up appointment came up, and as I'm filling out that same questionnaire I realize he has improved in all the areas except for speech and is still not even saying "momma" with any intentionality. But he is babbling to himself all day long or in the car, and the "uh uh" is much more distinctive and purposeful in telling me what he wants.

So in discussing everything with the doctor, i again voiced my slight concern. I have never been too concerned b/c as soon as I tell any mother or any woman for that matter I inevitable hear, "my 2nd son didn't talk until he was 3 and then he spoke in full sentences right away, or I have a nephew who didn't say one word until he was 2 and he is fine". Or I hear how much doctors just need to have every child on a chart and don't like to see a child doing something in a different time frame.  So I have never been too worried, but it something to sorta take note of I guess. All I wanted was for my doctor to tell me, "he is the second son, his personality is super laid back, and his brother talks non stop, so don't worry". Well at his 15 months check up, the doctor wanted to do a follow up appointment with an early childhood intervention. Because honestly not one thing had changed in the 3 months time as far as his "communication" goes or his speaking.

The first initial interview was last Friday and this Wednesday is the "real deal". We go to a place where a "team" of "professionals" will evaluate him, play with him, see his interaction with his brother and mother is, and doing a hearing and vision test. We will have the results from that I assume pretty soon after all the reports are typed up and made. And I will know more. 

I know Landon is smart. He observes everything! He watches and figures things out, he is more patient in figuring things out (especially than his brother Carson). He understands EVERYTHING (just about) I say to him. he shakes and nods his head in response to questions asked him. And he notices everything! He also definitely knows how to tell me what he is wanting! He grunts and whines and pulls me, and moves my hands to get across anything he needs to.

So we are waiting right now. One minute I convince myself - oh nothing is wrong, he is laid back, and also stubborn about doing things that i want him to do. (hehehe, i.e. say the word when I want him to say it) His brother talks non stop and always answers for him or repeats the word I want Landon to say, so why does he need to talk. The next minute I am concerned about his hearing or maybe a delay developmentally. One minute I feel it's dumb to go through with this whole thing when I know it's all fine. The next minute I would never forgive myself if there was something wrong that I could have corrected by catching it at such a young age.

So as parents we are only doing what we know and pray to be the wisest for our son in this situation. I pray that God will give Richard and I wisdom with the outcome of these "studies". That we will be wise and that we will trust God.

One thing I've learned about parenthood is - don't judge! every parent is trying their hardest to love, train and raise their children. And most parents are honestly seeking to do the right thing. Whether that is different than how you would do it - is not something to judge about!

Horsetooth!!!!

Many of you know that I enjoy running. I never really considered myself a "runner" though, b/c I mostly did it for pleasure, enjoyment, and exercise. I have done a few random 5k's and one 10 K race in the time frame of about 2 (or maybe a little more) years. No record breaking times on those runs, mostly b/c it's fun and I always have had a competitive side to me when it came to physical activity. (not board games. :) )

Since moving here to Fort Collins I've started getting involved in the "running community".  I've enjoyed having people to meet up with in the dark early freezing morning hours to get a run in during the week, and the longer runs are much more enjoyable when you have someone to talk with.

One of my goals before turning 30 was to run a half marathon.
Well - what better time than NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So I took the plunge.
April 22nd 2012 I will hopefully accomplish that goal. Hopefully in less than 2 and half hours, preferrably closer to 2 hrs. time frame. I will train with this group who happen to be training for a full marathon in May so I should be good right?!?!! :)

here I come!!!!!!

The only problem and the reason i debated about it for so long is the ascent.  Please please click on this link so that you can see what I'm talking about!!!!  the first picture is of the area that the run will take place. And that is just one example of a hill I will be running up!

No big major goals - just want to finish running and alive!

Maybe then I will consider myself a RUNNER!

Wish me luck!

Embrace the Camera

First time I'm participating in this link up - Embrace the Camera!

I'm embracing the camera in the mundane after nap snack time of porcorn! Our favorite around here!

Trying to ENJOY these special days at home with my boys! even in the everday!

Outside

My boys love being outside.

Gone are the days of opening my back door and letting them run outside, when they get a little wound up, while I gather some things and head out there to watch them play in the security and privacy of our fenced in yard. 

Now I have to walk down 3 flights of stairs with balls, jackets, toys, and of course phone and camera :) and walk across the apartment complex parking lot to the tennis courts. And I want to make this trip worth it and spend significant time outdoors since it takes effort to actually get outdoors.

Boy I miss the fenced in yard that we had. 

Today, my friends, was a beautiful sunny January day!!!!! 

And ENJOY IT WE DID

Monday News

1. Phew what a week and weekend we had! Richard was preaching at our church this past Sunday. He always does a great job. But working a full time job, leading a small group, investing in people's lives, doing a leadership training class and helping a "needy" wife with toddlers really puts a damper on study time. Work always seems to "blow up" the week before he has to preach too. He was super busy with a lot of responsibility.

But like always - the week is over, we accomplished everything we were supposed to and we all survived. And Richard preached with Flying Colors I might add. I always appreciate listening to him "expound the word". 

2. yeah, I really need to transition Landon to 18 month clothes but you know how that goes. . .

3. Like I said - this weekend was super busy. It started out with a busy day on friday out at chick fil a with a friends, and a wonderful dinner out with friends celebrating them closing on their second house! what a Fun night we had. Completely made my week - being able to enjoy our time at the restaurant with friends.

-but the boys were up late. Saturday they were up early and out at the church most of the day for our leadership training class (porterbrook session). 

4. Sunday - morning spent at church. and afternoon and a lot of the evening spent at friends watching the Bronco's game! and might I just add, they won their first play off game in the first 11 seconds of overtime! I had one VERY HAPPY HUSBAND on my hands last night

But all that to say - today is a mellow, lay low kind of day! I'm not even dressed or showered and still deciding if I even want to. :)

these pictures really show you how tired my boys were after a long weekend. It was not even 11 AM yet, and Landon crawls up into my lap and literally falls alseep instantly. He has NEVER done that!

Most of you know - I don't particularly enjoy Monday's. Mostly b/c I'm home by myself again, Richard is working and we're back at the daily grind. But today i determined to enjoy the sweet cuddles. The time I spend building and fixing train tracks on our living room rug. And just ENJOYing life!!!!! Truly ENJOY! the life that God gave me!

So I let him sleep there for about a half hour while Carson watched more PBS. And now I'm paying for it, b/c his afternoon nap is not going so well.
Oh well. I loved the extra cuddles.

And just in case anyone is interested. here is Richard's sermon link. he did an awesome job. So encouraging to think about Jesus, he is king, he is God, and he died for me.

I hope you all have a great week! Think on Christ in the creation around you. And live your daily lives in light of the salvation God provided through his son!

Sunset

Moving has been harder for me in ways that I didn't expect it would be. Some days are worse than others but there have been some things that have been discouraging to me, and some things that make me miss how life was before. (funny - huh, b/c if I remember correctly I couldn't wait for change).

It's funny how our human heart 

has a hard time being content

 with our situation right now. 

How we think we deserve something better.

Then there are night's like last night -

Such a beautiful sunset. To remind me of the beautiful state that I live in. To remind me of God's goodness to me. To remind me I already have way more than I can ever fathom to deserve b/c God's loves me, chose me, and blesses me.

Sorry these pictures aren't the best quality and are no comparison to what it looked like in real life. I took with a cell phone after picking Richard up from work. Just imagine how awesome it truly was.

Colorado has some of the most beautiful sunsets and often too! I love that! (and on a side note: the sunrises have been just as beautiful lately)

Thank you God for your faithfulness to me. Thank you for your patience with my sinful heart! 

What a GUY!

I write this post with a little fear. I've had several friends tell me they hate when people go on and on about how perfect their marriage is or all the wonderful things their husband does. B/c we all know that's not necessarily true all the time like they make it seem and it can make other's start comparing their husband to what this person is making her life out to be. (therefore sparking slight resentment) I in no way want to be "that person" that gloats - but there is a place for praising your husband.

People ask me all the time - how do you have time to run? - the answer is almost entirely - Because I have a supportive husband who graciously watches the boys for me. He is so willing to get up in the morning with them and feed them breakfast, so I can be out running. Or readily stays home with them after a long day of work, b/c I'm at my wits end and need to refresh my mind exercising. I am so thankful for him and for his help with the boys so that I can run!

He also builds amazing Train tracks for Carson. :)

Thank you Richard for helping me out so much with the boys. For being so involved in their lives! I know I don't always recognize it or say thank you enough!

But thank You! 

I couldn't live this life without you!