|Look at my two blessings!!!!!!|
How could I ever get frustrated with those two little
ones running all around???!?!!?
I'm busy! I fail miserably! I get so selfish in my own desires and in turn get frustrated when my desires are interrupted.
There are days when I feel so irritated and frustrated at the events that happen. Or to be quite honest with you - listening to Carson talk literally NON-STOP. No break! and repeating himself a gazillion times. Do other toddlers do this? I have never heard a toddler talk/repeat as much as he does! How do I get it to be toned down a little???? (my natural reaction to things is getting frustrated, I rarely cry about anything, but I get "mad" very easily about situations, i always wish i cried instead, it seems less sinful)
Now that Carson is getting older I'm sensing the urgency to teach him about life and godliness. He understands and speaks so much! To teach him about the wonderful God who gave his only son, to redeem us, even though we do not deserve it. About a Loving God who desires our hearts praise and obedience. A God who I want to serve with my whole heart, and love and praise, THE KING- but also the God that I fail daily, minutely. How do I teach him these things?
I've heard it said before we have to breathe it all day long for it to overflow from us. But I fail at that. It's so daunting to me this huge responsibility. I realize as days pass me by that I have already failed.
But this is where the good news comes in. God is bigger than me. He gives me wisdom to handle the situations and he can calm my heart and mind. I have the Holy Spirit in me to guide me and help me throughout the day. And God's ways are bigger than my ways. His Will will be done despite myself. And I will revel in his goodness and grace towards me, b/c I know that if any good happens in this household it is not b/c of me or my "good parenting" but b/c God is gracious to me to give me that gift. I just need to trust Him and obey him and show my children love.
I compare my "parenting skills" to other mothers or families and I am either encouraged or very discouraged. I need to just focus on our lives and what my boys need from me.
I pray that I don't waste this precious time with them. I pray that they see, through their mother and father, a loving God that wants to see them accept his gift, . It's daunting to say the least - and I feel very inadequate or "not godly enough" to be the one to teach them these things. I wonder if we have enough purpose in our parenting (sometimes I feel like we are flying by the seat of our pants for each new "fit" that happens) - but I need to trust God, I need to learn and obey his Word.
Here's to trusting God to poor grace into our lives despite this sinful mother!!!
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