I'm trying to think how I can word what I'm feeling right now. Its like I know all the right things to say, but yet its hard to believe them and act and respond to my belief. I have a tendacy to worry and stress about things, finances, schedules, even stuff like the economy and the voting and what's going to happen to our lives in this country, what if's. Somedays I feel like I just worry about everything under the sun.
At the same time, I don't know how unsaved people can live every day with out the under riding assurance that there is a God in control, that he takes care of us, and that his plan is sovereign for every issue that I worry about. I know that the "world" worries about things and I can't figure out how they just go about everyday without some sort of assurance that someone is controlling this whole world.
Some days I feel like the only reason I should get up and control my thoughts is because I believe that there is a God. But at the same time, if I'm looking for some sort of calming feeling to overcome me when I think or read about God's promises on loving and taking care of us, there isn't much relief. But I'm starting to realize (probably again, I'm always in need of remembering this fact) that Faith isn't about feelings. A good friend Meghan Osborne was the person who first started to make me realize this and through her death it really became a realization. I choose to everday put my Faith in a God who I believe in, I believe that the Bible is true even when I don't understand everything there is to understand about it. I have to choose to believe that events and situations are all part of God's plan.
I think even just writing this out has made things seem a little brighter. I don't know if this will make sense to people or sound like I'm crazy. But its just something that I have to remind my self about. God is in Control, His way is Best, and there is no need to worry about things.