Gardner Clan

2012-01-24T15:27:00.004-07:00

These pictures, my friends,

are so so small to you all

but huge to me.

Carson is active; very agile and athletic and coordinated. I love that about him.

- But coloring or painting is not necessarily his strong suit. It's easy for me to compare to what other kids are doing or get frustrated with him when he begs to color but then spends the entire time taking the crayons out of the box and throwing them all over the room. Coloring is almost a dreaded activity for me b/c I get frustrated!

I have bought him water colors and we have tried this avenue a few times - he has always gotten disinterested very quickly. But this day - for some reason - he was having so much fun coloring in the fishes that I had outlined for him. (please excuse my terrible drawing - I know from whom he gets his "non-crafty/creative" mind) But he spent a good chunk of time actually coloring in the pictures and wanting me to draw more - instead of eating the paint brushes or splatting water all across the room.

MILESTONES - that's what we're talking about!

Blue Monday

2012-01-23T14:37:00.001-07:00

I just read that today - Jan 23, 2012 is considered the most depressing day of the year! I'm glad I have an explanation for how I'm feeling today. ha

My heart if full of many things to say - but no words to say them. I'm struggling with how exactly to put things down - b/c I've been mis-took so many times after I've written from the heart. (which I know is one of the dangers of blogging, but you know, whether you're in person, or texting, or email or phone convo - this is a danger)

My desire with this blog is to document our life - but more importantly I want so much for Christ to shine through. I want Him to be glorified in the mundane of life. I want people to see that there is joy in life because God loves us and chose me to live with him, and to help further his kingdom in his BIG STORY for this world! I am a part of it!

Motherhood (or really LIFE in general) is not easy! there are hard days, lonely days, and frustrating days, and "feeling guilty" days. But what greater joy and blessing than to have children and see them grow, to nurture them, and care for all their needs.

I have been convicted recently on my "tone" or "anger" towards my boys. How often to do I respond in frustration b/c of something else being dumped out, or thrown across the room, or ripped apart - when I could respond with Gentleness!!!! How many times do I say "no" to them or give them a negative command - and don't have positive feedback or give them positive attention.

This all happened within 5 min of
dinner trying to be prepared

Many days I go to sleep "feeling guilty" for the tone I used so often during the day. I wish i could go back and change it - but the next day it starts all over again.

This is where I hope people can see God's grace being poured out on me! I'm not perfect, I fail so many times throughout the day - but God loves me, He loves my children, and He is pouring Grace on my life teaching me and showing me areas I need to concentrate on to be more like Him!

Even in the mundane of park days, or laundry days, or discipline questions, or seeking wisdom for decisions for you kids, or life altering decisions like moving - WE ARE BLESSED beyond measure already because of Christ who died in our place and forgave us our sins if we have FAITH in him!

The passage below is my prayer for myself and for you as fellow mothers (and I really do pray for a lot of you especially if you have asked me, or I know your situation! It's how I feel connected to friends while I stay at home with no car!) I think of you mother/friends often throughout my day.
Let us strive for our lives to be a light to our children and our neighbors and the world around - that we love them and that Christ loves for them shines through us!

And also importantly

I hope we ENJOY our lives!!!!!!!

Ephesians 3: 14-21

14For this reason I kneel before the Father,

¹⁵ from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name.

¹⁶ I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being,

¹⁷ so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love,

¹⁸ may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ,

¹⁹ and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

²⁰ Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us,

²¹ to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

What a day!

2012-01-19T14:55:00.001-07:00

Today has been a great day! Some days are just great. I'm filled with joy and I love my life. (believe me for as many days like today as there is, there are plenty of days that are not like this). And as a side note: I'm striving to not let either feeling determine how I treat my family because of the truth of God's saving Grace in my life!

And in the life of a

2 year old boy!

Nothing could be more exciting.

The day started with an early 6 am run. Compared to the single digit degrees I had been running in - the 45 degree weather today was enough in and of itself to make it a better day.

I got home and had to run to the grocery store to get a couple ingredients b/c at our Life Group tonight we are having a meal - and the meal is Breakfast food! Now could it get any better than that??!!? I would venture to say no. anyways - I had to get some ingredients for the dish i want to take tonight -

So I surprised

all the boys with bringing home

Donuts!!!!

Now that is a good morning.

Because - Why NOT??!!?

Later in the Morning we went to the park - which happens to be located right next to a fire station. Carson saw a fire truck pulling into the station and ran over to watch. I tried to make him stand back and "not bother" them b/c I know they are probably busy about their responsibilities. When it got into the building I told Carson to walk away and we started heading back to the park area. But one of the Fire man came around and called us back in. So I ran and got Landon and we had a tour of the fire truck! It was the coolest thing. I was amazed.

They were wonderful to him! The fireman let him sit in the driver's seat, he turned on the truck and showed him all the lights and showed him the hose and everything! it was so cool!!! They brought hats to my two boys and stickers, and a coloring book and pencils.!!!!
I was an ecstatic mother; thinking "this is so cool, and so wonderful, and so nice!"
Carson was a little hesitant and a little shy and uneasy- but he sat there fine. He won't stop talking about it now and wearing the hat!

Of course of all the days I had forgotten my camera. I said something about wishing I could take a picture - and another fireman took out his phone and took a pic for me and sent it to me! They were wonderful!!!!! I only have one picture of the event! But boy!

I will remember it for a

while and the boys will too!

unedited version!

playing with the editing

Now I know though - take a shower and change out of your running clothes before you go to the park - you never know when something monumental will be cataloged!

woops!

2012-01-18T13:49:00.001-07:00

First of all i need to say thank you to everyone who has been so encouraging to me since my last post. between phone calls, texts, emails, comments and people talking to me - everyone has been so encouraging. I will almost feel bad if nothing is wrong b/c I had so many people praying for me. :) It's so wonderful to know that I have such caring friends all over the place. (and that you guys actually read my blog ha)

Second of all - I feel really dumb! Yes, Dumb. I can't say that I've ever done something like this to this extent. I had "the entire world" (practically) praying for me today. and I messed up. haha - it's funny i think.

I started my day out meeting my cool new running friends, in terribly windy conditions, and if I was to run by myself there is no way I would've made it out, so I'm thankful to have running friends. WE finished our 4 mile loop and I rush home, shower and got dressed up. B/c this is the day i get the car and I'm going out! Which for me lately this winter is a big deal. ha. I have a wonderful wonderful husband who not only made myself and himself "eggs in a basket" but also dressed himself, finished making his lunch (b/c I didn't have to time to finish it) and dressed both boys!!!! WOW! That's amazing. We loaded everyone up, and took him to work by 9. Then I had to run by the bank and the post office to run some errands. Then it was off to the big "EVALUATION" for Landon.

Something in my head starts questioning what the date actually is. I vaguely remember writing something about the 20something of Jan. So I look at my phone to see what the date is. It's only the 18th! then I look at the paper with the reminder on it, and it actually says my appointment is on the 25th!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Who would've thought I would convince myself and the entire world that my appointment was this week, when in fact IT'S NEXT WEEK!!!!
So all that work of getting out of the house, and asking everyone to pray and fretting and we get to all do it again next week!

I did think - well it's a good thing it didn't happen the other way around! Like it was today and I was thinking it was next week. Then we would be up a creek!
So - more on all this next week!

Sweet Landon

2012-01-16T15:15:00.000-07:00

I haven't posted about this on my blog yet (although i've talked to many people about it) and mostly I haven't because I know what everyone will say. But now I actually think it would make me feel better to hear other's stories or opinions. :)

Landon is 16 months old. He has not really said anything at all. And probably just within the last week has he even showed any signs of repeating syllables that go along with a word. You know those ASQ's you fill out at the doctor's office for their well baby check ups. Well at a year old Landon wasn't saying 3-4 words like "they" want them to at that age. I showed some concern to the doctor mentioning that I see no real Desire even in landon in coming close to even forming words. He gave me some "techniques" to use to maybe force landon to start speaking. Such as, repeating "cup" or "please" or "ball" to him multiple times instead of just giving him what I knew "uh, uh" meant. (since I'm the mother I've had no problem in discerning whether that "uh, uh" means I'm full, I'm thirsty, I would like to get down, or carson took my blanket". :) )

So for the next 3 months I really worked on being intentional with him regarding this issue. the 15 month check up appointment came up, and as I'm filling out that same questionnaire I realize he has improved in all the areas except for speech and is still not even saying "momma" with any intentionality. But he is babbling to himself all day long or in the car, and the "uh uh" is much more distinctive and purposeful in telling me what he wants.

So in discussing everything with the doctor, i again voiced my slight concern. I have never been too concerned b/c as soon as I tell any mother or any woman for that matter I inevitable hear, "my 2nd son didn't talk until he was 3 and then he spoke in full sentences right away, or I have a nephew who didn't say one word until he was 2 and he is fine". Or I hear how much doctors just need to have every child on a chart and don't like to see a child doing something in a different time frame. So I have never been too worried, but it something to sorta take note of I guess. All I wanted was for my doctor to tell me, "he is the second son, his personality is super laid back, and his brother talks non stop, so don't worry". Well at his 15 months check up, the doctor wanted to do a follow up appointment with an early childhood intervention. Because honestly not one thing had changed in the 3 months time as far as his "communication" goes or his speaking.

The first initial interview was last Friday and this Wednesday is the "real deal". We go to a place where a "team" of "professionals" will evaluate him, play with him, see his interaction with his brother and mother is, and doing a hearing and vision test. We will have the results from that I assume pretty soon after all the reports are typed up and made. And I will know more.

I know Landon is smart. He observes everything! He watches and figures things out, he is more patient in figuring things out (especially than his brother Carson). He understands EVERYTHING (just about) I say to him. he shakes and nods his head in response to questions asked him. And he notices everything! He also definitely knows how to tell me what he is wanting! He grunts and whines and pulls me, and moves my hands to get across anything he needs to.

So we are waiting right now. One minute I convince myself - oh nothing is wrong, he is laid back, and also stubborn about doing things that i want him to do. (hehehe, i.e. say the word when I want him to say it) His brother talks non stop and always answers for him or repeats the word I want Landon to say, so why does he need to talk. The next minute I am concerned about his hearing or maybe a delay developmentally. One minute I feel it's dumb to go through with this whole thing when I know it's all fine. The next minute I would never forgive myself if there was something wrong that I could have corrected by catching it at such a young age.

So as parents we are only doing what we know and pray to be the wisest for our son in this situation. I pray that God will give Richard and I wisdom with the outcome of these "studies". That we will be wise and that we will trust God.

One thing I've learned about parenthood is - don't judge! every parent is trying their hardest to love, train and raise their children. And most parents are honestly seeking to do the right thing. Whether that is different than how you would do it - is not something to judge about!

Horsetooth!!!!

2012-01-13T09:24:00.000-07:00

Many of you know that I enjoy running. I never really considered myself a "runner" though, b/c I mostly did it for pleasure, enjoyment, and exercise. I have done a few random 5k's and one 10 K race in the time frame of about 2 (or maybe a little more) years. No record breaking times on those runs, mostly b/c it's fun and I always have had a competitive side to me when it came to physical activity. (not board games. :) )

Since moving here to Fort Collins I've started getting involved in the "running community". I've enjoyed having people to meet up with in the dark early freezing morning hours to get a run in during the week, and the longer runs are much more enjoyable when you have someone to talk with.

One of my goals before turning 30 was to run a half marathon.
Well - what better time than NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So I took the plunge.
April 22nd 2012 I will hopefully accomplish that goal. Hopefully in less than 2 and half hours, preferrably closer to 2 hrs. time frame. I will train with this group who happen to be training for a full marathon in May so I should be good right?!?!! :)

here I come!!!!!!

The only problem and the reason i debated about it for so long is the ascent. Please please click on this link so that you can see what I'm talking about!!!! the first picture is of the area that the run will take place. And that is just one example of a hill I will be running up!

No big major goals - just want to finish running and alive!

Maybe then I will consider myself a RUNNER!

Wish me luck!

Embrace the Camera

2012-01-12T16:00:00.002-07:00

First time I'm participating in this link up - Embrace the Camera!

I'm embracing the camera in the mundane after nap snack time of porcorn! Our favorite around here!

Trying to ENJOY these special days at home with my boys! even in the everday!

Outside

2012-01-10T15:55:00.000-07:00

My boys love being outside.

Gone are the days of opening my back door and letting them run outside, when they get a little wound up, while I gather some things and head out there to watch them play in the security and privacy of our fenced in yard.

Now I have to walk down 3 flights of stairs with balls, jackets, toys, and of course phone and camera :) and walk across the apartment complex parking lot to the tennis courts. And I want to make this trip worth it and spend significant time outdoors since it takes effort to actually get outdoors.

Boy I miss the fenced in yard that we had.

Today, my friends, was a beautiful sunny January day!!!!!

And ENJOY IT WE DID

Monday News

2012-01-09T13:52:00.000-07:00

1. Phew what a week and weekend we had! Richard was preaching at our church this past Sunday. He always does a great job. But working a full time job, leading a small group, investing in people's lives, doing a leadership training class and helping a "needy" wife with toddlers really puts a damper on study time. Work always seems to "blow up" the week before he has to preach too. He was super busy with a lot of responsibility.

But like always - the week is over, we accomplished everything we were supposed to and we all survived. And Richard preached with Flying Colors I might add. I always appreciate listening to him "expound the word".

2. yeah, I really need to transition Landon to 18 month clothes but you know how that goes. . .

3. Like I said - this weekend was super busy. It started out with a busy day on friday out at chick fil a with a friends, and a wonderful dinner out with friends celebrating them closing on their second house! what a Fun night we had. Completely made my week - being able to enjoy our time at the restaurant with friends.

-but the boys were up late. Saturday they were up early and out at the church most of the day for our leadership training class (porterbrook session).

4. Sunday - morning spent at church. and afternoon and a lot of the evening spent at friends watching the Bronco's game! and might I just add, they won their first play off game in the first 11 seconds of overtime! I had one VERY HAPPY HUSBAND on my hands last night

But all that to say - today is a mellow, lay low kind of day! I'm not even dressed or showered and still deciding if I even want to. :)

these pictures really show you how tired my boys were after a long weekend. It was not even 11 AM yet, and Landon crawls up into my lap and literally falls alseep instantly. He has NEVER done that!

Most of you know - I don't particularly enjoy Monday's. Mostly b/c I'm home by myself again, Richard is working and we're back at the daily grind. But today i determined to enjoy the sweet cuddles. The time I spend building and fixing train tracks on our living room rug. And just ENJOYing life!!!!! Truly ENJOY! the life that God gave me!

So I let him sleep there for about a half hour while Carson watched more PBS. And now I'm paying for it, b/c his afternoon nap is not going so well.
Oh well. I loved the extra cuddles.

And just in case anyone is interested. here is Richard's sermon link. he did an awesome job. So encouraging to think about Jesus, he is king, he is God, and he died for me.

I hope you all have a great week! Think on Christ in the creation around you. And live your daily lives in light of the salvation God provided through his son!

Sunset

2012-01-05T14:11:00.000-07:00

Moving has been harder for me in ways that I didn't expect it would be. Some days are worse than others but there have been some things that have been discouraging to me, and some things that make me miss how life was before. (funny - huh, b/c if I remember correctly I couldn't wait for change).

It's funny how our human heart

has a hard time being content

with our situation right now.

How we think we deserve something better.

Then there are night's like last night -

Such a beautiful sunset. To remind me of the beautiful state that I live in. To remind me of God's goodness to me. To remind me I already have way more than I can ever fathom to deserve b/c God's loves me, chose me, and blesses me.

Sorry these pictures aren't the best quality and are no comparison to what it looked like in real life. I took with a cell phone after picking Richard up from work. Just imagine how awesome it truly was.

Colorado has some of the most beautiful sunsets and often too! I love that! (and on a side note: the sunrises have been just as beautiful lately)

Thank you God for your faithfulness to me. Thank you for your patience with my sinful heart!

What a GUY!

2012-01-02T15:50:00.000-07:00

I write this post with a little fear. I've had several friends tell me they hate when people go on and on about how perfect their marriage is or all the wonderful things their husband does. B/c we all know that's not necessarily true all the time like they make it seem and it can make other's start comparing their husband to what this person is making her life out to be. (therefore sparking slight resentment) I in no way want to be "that person" that gloats - but there is a place for praising your husband.

People ask me all the time - how do you have time to run? - the answer is almost entirely - Because I have a supportive husband who graciously watches the boys for me. He is so willing to get up in the morning with them and feed them breakfast, so I can be out running. Or readily stays home with them after a long day of work, b/c I'm at my wits end and need to refresh my mind exercising. I am so thankful for him and for his help with the boys so that I can run!

He also builds amazing Train tracks for Carson. :)

Thank you Richard for helping me out so much with the boys. For being so involved in their lives! I know I don't always recognize it or say thank you enough!

But thank You!

I couldn't live this life without you!

Year 2011 In Review

2011-12-29T14:32:00.001-07:00

This is so much fun for me to do. What a joy to look through my year. To think back at the beginning of the year wondering what we were supposed to do, how it would turn out, where we would be. And to think all in 1 year.
The only thing that comes to mind is Praise God, Thank you God. Thank you for providing for us, although we don't have much, we do not owe anyone. Thank you for Guiding us. Thank you for protecting us. Thank you for molding us a little closer into your image.
So here you go - Year in Review

January

Indoors with newborn. mostly all i did was blog and nurse I think :)

February

We were in charge of a fondue night at our church for Valentine's day. turned out great, but took a lot of planning. And hosted

a small Superbowl Party at our house!

March

Carson Turned 2!

April

Weekend getaway with the hubs! :)

(Mostly to celebrate done nursing :))

May

I ran 5K (first one since giving birth)

Memorial Day trip to lake beach with family
And Richard graduated with his Master in Biblical Studies

June

Aunt Becky got married

in Colorado. Decision was also

made to move to Fort Collins!! :)

July

Ran a 5K with my twin. Drank a lot of Iced coffee's b/c it was

hot and I knew there was none in CO. a lot of uncertainty

with no job or housing or anything

in our soon to be new home

August

We moved from Scranton PA to Fort Collins CO

yeah, that pretty much sums up the month! :)

September

Adjust to life in CO and loving the great weather

Celebrated my 27th Bday, and Landon's 1 yr Bday

October

October was a busy month, but highlight of month was

meeting my new nephew in MN, and seeing my

mom again.

But also involved, running my first 10K and

seeing my Gardner side of the family

and a lot of fall activities, like Halloween.

It was really hard to pick just one picture this month ;)

November

Got 2 big snow storms, spent thanksgiving with the Gardners

and Richard and I spent 3 whole days

together by ourselves without the boys to celebrate

5 whole years of Marriage. :)

December

Merry Christmas

What fun to put this post together. I hope you have as much fun looking through it as I did putting it together. What a privilege to see what God has done in our lives. How he has changed us and loved us, and how much more I love Him b/c of it!

And a Happy 2012

Had Fun Linking up with

Hope you do too ;)

Also linking up with

Sledding

2011-12-28T13:50:00.000-07:00

Last winter Carson hated the cold/snow. He wouldn't even walk to the car or store. I was carrying a newborn and a 2 year old! :)

This year he is loving it! He loves to pick up the snow, make footprints in it, and now he has learned the art of sledding.

Monday we were in Denver with Richard's brother and family. They got dumped on with snow right before Christmas. So we took advantage of it! We went to a great place called Ruby Hill. What a perfect place. We only had one sled and we had to borrow some good snow clothes (which now that I think about it, that might be why he didn't like the snow too much last year. :) ) it was so warm and sunny out, which made it perfect for sledding b/c it wasn't too chilly. The kids loved it!

Carson's cousin Aspen was a good example
to really enjoy the snow!

Christmas 2011

2011-12-27T17:38:00.002-07:00

This was not a good year for Family pictures at all! :(

I'm so sad to say. We need a new camera and will probably get one

soon.

But we did have some feeble attempts at good family pictures

Thursday evening:

Richard got off of work at normal time. We had a sorry excuse for a dinner

(mostly b/c I did not want to cook and was on vacation mode)

Then drove around Fort Collins and saw all the beautiful lights.

Boys in their christmas pj's :)

It's always fun trying to drive around town to find the coolest

neighborhood. And we have to pick out our favorite house. :)

We also got stuck in the snow. :) It was a beautiful night for light-seeing. Just snowed and the town

was glistening.

One particular street was not plowed well at all. and yes, we got stuck

What a fun memory of Carson scared to death in the back,

landon sound asleep,

and Richard pushing the car

while I try to gun it out. :)Only with our Alero in Colorado :)

The rest of the Christmas season was spent in Grand Junction CO

Woke up super early Friday Morning

made the 5 hour trek to Grand Junction

We had beautiful scenery. It had snowed a ton about a day before.

The mountains were just amazing

the wildlife along the road was so cool.

The boys were showered with gifts

and love from both sides

of our families.

Our day was filled, literally filled, with

good food, skyping distant family, chatting with present family

and playing trains with the boys.

We did have a little bit of sickness.

Landon had a fever for like 4 days. Low Grade and no other symptoms

but momma was starting to worry

then, as fast as it came on it left. :/ What can I say?
Teeth?!?? i have no idea!

We are so thankful!

And we had a great Christmas Season!

Now onto New Years!

Ziploc Bags

2011-12-20T13:28:00.001-07:00

yes, Folks I'm psycho about my ziploc bags. For two reasons: 1. I grew up in Ecuador where we had to bring them back from the states, so we saved them all the time, b/c they were precious to us and we couldn't easily get more. 2. I like to think I'm frugal, and don't like to buy new ones. They are expensive sometimes

So I save my ziploc bags if they are not gross and haven't had meat in them. I wash them out and dry them like this. I've done it my whole growing up life, and grown up life. :)

So - if you give me something in a ziploc bag - please know you made my day!

if I give you something in a ziploc bag - know I think you're special! :)

WOW!

2011-12-19T15:34:00.000-07:00

What a whirlwind of emotions going through my head. What a crazy last 24 hrs this has been. (or maybe a little more).
From being at church - being so encouraged by the fellowship of the body of believers that we have here. A family! Learning to live life together, showing that we are a community that loves each other and most of all showing Christ to a desperate needy world. Showing this hurting world Christ's love that we celebrate this season. That he came as a baby, in human form to die for our sins so that we can have eternal life.

To - getting a call in the middle of the night that my friend is starting labor. Woohooo! I'm so thankful to help someone in the same way we were helped when we didn't have very much family nearby, and our second baby was born. It truly was a joy to me to finish out the night at their house with their toddler, and now spending the day enjoying my 2 boys and their boy, playing while I pray over the new life entering the world.

But as one friend welcomes a new precious baby, their own flesh and blood, into the world,
another friend - grieves the loss of their baby! My heart breaks at the same time today! For the pain and hurt and disappointment and expectations not fulfilled! for the long road ahead of grieving and molding and shaping.

I can't help but sing - He gives and takes away, Blessed be the name of the Lord!



Blessed Be Your Name
In the land that is plentiful
Where Your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name

Blessed Be Your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed Be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's 'all as it should be'
Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name

it's Christmas! We celebrate Christ, who came to us lowly sinners
to save us. He suffered in our place
so that we can have hope, peace, grace filled lives. Be forgiven
So that we can bring Glory to God
And no matter the circumstance - Blessed be HIS NAME!!!

2011-12-18T15:22:00.001-07:00

It's been a few days since I've updated. and I even missed my Random facts Friday. :( The reason for the lack of writing is b/c we've been doing a lot and it's been so much fun. But sadly I forgot my camera all the time so I can't document it.

Friday i drove down to Denver and we had a great time with our cousins making and decorating Christmas cookies. My sister in law had a great recipe for cut out cookies (it had orange zest and orange juice in it) and they are amazing!!!!! It was a great day out for me. The boys were amused for a short amount of time with the cookie decorating - but overall it was a great day. We made a mess of her kitchen and she was so gracious about it. :)

The rest of the weekend was filled with, baby shower, 40th birthday for our pastor, Christmas shopping for family and the boys.

My mother, even though she lives overseas, she has managed to always buy great Christmas matching outfits for my boys! I love to dress them up like this and they got lots of attention at church for their cute-ness. :) I'm pretty sure they will wear these outfits for 3 weeks in a row 1) b/c they are so cute, 2) so that I can get good use out of them.

Random facts-
-I had to get the boys ready for church today by myself b/c Richard had to go early -it was a kinda hectic morning b/c they also need baths!!! (Baths are not fun here in our house, mine cry all the time)
- I picked up literally a million cheerios off the ground today b/c for some reason every time I left the room Carson thought i was funny to pour them all over the floor! For some reason I kept leaving them within his reach
-Landon found bananas in the boys trash can (for some reason Carson has been taking one or two bites of his banana and hiding them in his trash can without be knowing) and was eating them! Who knows how long they had been in there and it was GROSS!!!!
-Thankful for God's forgiving Grace even though it was a frustrating morning and i did not react correctly to my boys! I'm a mother in desperate need for God's grace the whole day - and I'm thankful he has forgiven my sins and loves me despite my failings.

this really does still happen

2011-12-13T14:13:00.000-07:00

Today was a day out for me with the boys. We only have one car so i try to plan my days to go out and only need the car no more than 2 days a week. Boys had a doctor's check up appointment, so we loaded the boys into the car on the chilly morning and headed out the door to take Daddy to work. I had about 40 min in between dropping him off and the apt. time, so I thought "What a perfect time for a nice cup of coffee". :) They have a few random drive thru coffee places, that are surprisingly decent.

(every one knows that a drive-thru is a mother's

best friend!)

I was taking a right into the place, but a car was turning in from the other direction, she was their first, so I stopped and waved her through so she could get in line first to get her coffee. Didn't think a thing of it, because after all, I did have plenty of time! As I pulled up after her to the window to order my wonderful cup of hot coffee, the kind lady told me that the car in front of me

WANTED TO PAY FOR MY CUP OF COFFEE!!!!!!!!!!!!

b/c I was a kind driver.

I was flabbergasted! So surprised and so happy about it. As i stumbled about what I wanted, I still just ordered the cheap regular black coffee (thinking, i should've ordered a big expensive latte :) ) But what a nice special treat for me to begin my day out with the boys at the doctor's. ( and we all know, a cup of coffee goes a long way on days we have to take the kids to a doctor )

So lesson learned: be patient, let other's go first - and maybe one day I will pay for your coffee at the drive thru coffee shop!

The worst Parade Ever!

2011-12-12T21:34:00.003-07:00

I know the title sounds depressing, judgmental and negative - but it is true.
Needless to say I was very disappointed. :(

You see, I like to make events like this special for the kids and to experience things and just enjoy things. I had it in my mind that we were going to a nearby town for their supposed Parade Festival of Lights. I looked online and it stated they were doing snow sculpture competition things and little things going on all day and from 4:30-6 was the parade of lights. We were busy during the day, so we planned to just attend the parade. I was so excited about the fun family festive outing we were going to experience.

Well we got into the town and parked close by around 4:30pm just in time, but mind you, it's still not dark yet, dusk, but not dark. So in my mind "they could not be starting yet".
We find a bathroom very close to the happenings of the town. And can see the sculptures on the road and the road blocked off for parade. So we think, we'll stop for bathroom really fast, then walk up towards the parade and look at the cool ice sculptures on our way. Well as we are waiting in the bathroom I notice/hear parade start, so I say, "we have to hurry". So we run up, noticing the all of 5 ice sculptures, and find our spot along the road. We knew we had missed the beginning but thought we still had plenty of parade left. B/c it's a parade of lights afterall and it's just now getting dark enough to appreciate the lights.

So Richard sets up our chairs, we put a blanket over the boys to stay warm and settle in for the long haul. I was psyched thinking this was going to be so special.

I kid you not - one dance group went by us, one truck of lights that handed us tootsie rolls, a chick-fil-a truck that gave us free kid's meals vouchers, and then Santa went by and the parade was over!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I was heart broken. We had missed the entire parade. I looked at my watch thinking, this cannot be. It was barely 5 oclock, and the lighting of the sky was finally just then perfect for a light parade. But it was all over. All that work of getting the boys bundled, getting the chairs and blankets in the car, out of the car, and set up along the street, for literally 4 things!!!!! Who ever heard of a parade of lights so small and before it's actually dark?????!?!!!!?

Right before the great disappointment

I've never been so disappointed to see Santa at a parade. So so sad!!!!

The boys just sorta sat there and had no idea why we dragged them out there for that, and what the big hype mom was making about this whole parade thing.

Oh well, next year we will definitely go to a different city and try a different Festival of lights. hahaha

So instead, to help our downheartedness about the parade we went to Smashburger for the first time. I loved their sweet potato fries. It was still a fun night out as a family. But boy! What a disappointment of a parade.

Has this happened to anyone else? Does anyone have any funny stories about parades or fun events that turn out lame?

10 Random Things- Friday

2011-12-09T09:01:00.001-07:00

1. I cannot even believe that it's Friday again already. This doesn't happen to me often, but it seems like it was just last Friday. We love us a good Friday night around here! :)

2. A fellow RA from college was diagnosed with stage 4 brain cancer a very short while ago, and had surgery to remove the tumor. As of last night one grew back super fast in it's place and threatened to take her overnight. As far as I know she made it through the night, and is in surgery to remove it again this morning. In college people told us things like this would happen to our friends. When you're in college you wonder who will be "famous", who will fall into deep sin and turn away, who will be great missionaries etc. Now after 7 years these things are starting to happen to our fellow classmates. God's grace is pouring out on her very young family and husband and so many people are uplifting them in prayers. If anyone knew Heather - she was a gem, wonderful, sincere and loving of all people. It's very humbling, and encouraging and sorrowful all at the same time.

3. when I only had Carson, he would very routinely get a banana and a bowl of cheerios with milk just about every morning. They both still get a banana but Landon gets a bunch of dry cheerios dumped on his tray, what will happen to my third child? just handing him the box of cheerios and say "have at it" ? hehehe (I wonder if Landon is jealous when he sees carson with a bowl of cheerios with milk, while he gets dry cheerios on his tray? )

4. I think we are going to try to go to a Parade of Lights nearby tomorrow evening. I cannot wait.

5. I've started going to the Library regularly with the boys, and I love having a plethora of books to read to carson throughout the week. And mostly I love that he sits and listens to them.

6. Along the same line, I got a Dr. Seuss book Titled " Hunches in Bunches". Yeah, weird book and Carson always asks what those things are. It's really hard to explain to him, those hats that look like pointed hands are "hunches". What's a hunch? Dr. Seuss books are great and fun to read, but hard to explain to kids. Have you ever read "if I ran the circus"?? another very hard book to explain to my poor almost 3 year old.

7. I really need my hair trimmed, it looks very scraggly, but do not want to pay $30 bucks for a trim. Maybe I'll just still go to Fantastic Sams or Cost Cutters.

8. I know I've said this before, but Landon imitates EVERYTHING Carson does. Today i gave Carson a toasted bagel and told him to be careful b/c it was hot, Carson proceeded to blow on it. Landon got a piece of a non toasted bagel and he blew on the Not-hot piece, b/c Carson blew on his bagel. I thought that was funny. :) (Notice a trend Carson gets a toasted bagel with butter, and Landon gets a plain cold bagel, poor guy)

9. I pretty much finished all the "projects" that were making me busy, now I just have to do fun baking and presents for our small family!

10. My boys' faces are super dry here. :( Chapped, chapped, Chapped. (especially where the drool is constant, which is like the entire chin :) ) I put Eucerin on it like 100x's a day and have started using chapstick. Any other suggestions?

everyday in the life of the Gardners

2011-12-08T13:37:00.001-07:00

Ok - now that I've waisted all the precious naptime making these mundane pictures worthwhile - Let me me write a small little post. Then I need to shower (yes, i have not showered since my early morning run and I know that's gross, but hey, I hate to shower, but I must since we are going out in public tonight), study my material for Porterbrook, and write out my christmas cards plus make supper, all in about 3 hrs. i can do it!!!

But not before I enjoy a wonderful cup of Trader joe's coffee (do no ask me what number mug for the day that is unless you want to be amazed/surprises/or judge me) and the BEST MOST AMAZING caramel corn you will ever taste! I posted the recipe on pintrest so follow me and then look it up!!!!! i hope there is still some popcorn left for tonight's Life Group!!!!

Landon is really becoming such a Ham!!!!! He is so goofy. It amazes me how much he understands and communicates to me even if he never says anything besides UH, UH, UH, in a super whiny but very getyourattention kind of way! He watches EVERYTHING and really pays attention and figures things out!
For some reason he walks around the house with a little round cup and a stick. The variations of toys that fit this mold are amazing but he always has something like this in his hand, and he's banging them together.

ps -mum, I put the top right picture in just for you. I know you hate seeing pics of slobber. :) But this kid is SLOBBERY!!! If you see him without a string of drool down his chin - please document it for me, b/c I have never seen that.

And then my precious Carson - He loves to tear apart our living room, and jump all over the place. he is very athletic and is very proficient at any acrobatic move you can imagine, and if you haven't imagined it, he already has and done it. He communicates so well, and remembers so well. he has gotten considerably cuddly lately. I don't really know why - but he is always giving me a hug, or asking for hugs or asking to be carried "carry you" he says but he really means "carry me". It's just so funny that every time we respond "you want to carry me" he says "yes". :) LIke that's possible. :) I am soaking up the sweet moments of cuddles from him and he is so sweet!
We are working on not interrupting - which is not going so well, but if you have suggestions let me know - so one random time as he's yelling in a visitors face something very trivial while they are telling us a story, I say, "you need to say excuse me". From then on every time, he just repeats "excuse me" as fast and as many times as he can as close to your face as he can get until you acknowledge him, then he says something like "look that airplane" or soemthing very menial and funny. I can't help but laugh b/c he is saying excuse me but still very much so interrupting. I guess we'll keep working on that. :) he just has so much to say!

As I enter this busy time of year I want to still enjoy the days that I have at home, still teach my boys things and let them participate in my daily activities.

Now coffee is done, caramel corn is long gone (at least that portion, i shoulda just set the whole bowl in front of me) serenity is over! TIME TO GET MOVING!
I hope you all are having a great Thursday - I know we are here!

Everyone's doing it!

2011-12-05T20:20:00.001-07:00

Every one is posting posting pictures of their Christmas decorations that is. I'm very anti - dowhateveryoneelsedoes or very against "cliche" things- but it is Christmas after all and we are getting into the spirit.

It's been fun to see Carson finally starting to recognize Christmas trees everywhere and lights and just get excited about it. (although I'm pretty sure he doesn't have a clue about much except for christmas trees and lights) I'm not very crafty or very good about decorating any time of year - so Christmas is pretty slim in our house mostly b/c I'm either lazy or not good at knowing what to do with decorating. It took us a total of probably 30 min to decorate and that may or may not include setting up the tree. :(

I love that we have a fireplace!!!!!!

Simple is the way!

Hopefully this year I can get some clearance items for next year and spice up our collection of decorations :)

It's an exciting time of year and I love all the celebration and excitement and merriment that comes with it. I love all the food making/eating too. I love the little bit of extra socialization too. I hope to pass on all this joy to my sons. :)

But also need to start implementing the meaning behind the season. What we are celebrating - the birth of our Savior who came in fulfillment of God's perfect plan, to save a wretched soul like me and make me and heir with him. I pray that one day my sons will know the truth of the Gospel and accept it.

10 Random Facts Friday

2011-12-02T09:22:00.001-07:00

A look into how mundane

but beautiful life as

a mother really can be.

1. I have a stuffy nose and cold - not miserable but not comfortable either :)
2. Carson is pretending to cook/eat things, and he even pretended his blanket was a baby and put it to sleep and was talking like it woke up and stuff. So cute!
3. I only went out into civilization one day this week - library and lunch at panera with boys and a friend. (b/c we all know there is no civilization in our house with my two boys. hahahaha) and truly I don't know if in the winter it's worth it. To take Richard to work and pick him up, plus go to the places I need to, with all the coats and mittens and car seats. It was a lot of work.
4. I love looking in the back seat at the boys all bundled up squished into their car seats with their arms stiff out and mittens on the end. A little smile always pops out from under the bundle and it's really cute!
5. My living room at this current moment is covered with our couch cushions, train tracks, cars and books - and it's driving me crazy but I'm trying to just let them play. :) At least my bed is made that always helps.
6. Landon adores Carson - it's so cute to see him want to do and imitate everything Carson does.
7. I hope we get a chance to decorate and buy our real christmas tree and set that up this weekend.
8. Landon walks like a crab - sorta sideways, should I be worried?
9. We're having chicken Swiss bundles for supper - and we love it! recipe here -
10. We have no plans tonight - I hope we come up with something - b/c ITS FRIDAY NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Encouragement

2011-11-29T13:13:00.001-07:00

Every once in a while you meet a genuinely NICE person. I have been fortunate to find many wonderful people in my life. Yesterday I was blessed by a truly NICE and thoughtful person!

I received the best thing ever and it came at such a perfect time for my soul! What a way to uplift a friend's spirit.

If you read my posts here and here about mail this will make much more sense to you.

Low and behold a package!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! from a wonderful friend of our family.

What a perfect Surprise to end my day!

It was so thoughtful and so generous and so fun to show the boys. It was fun for me to remind Carson of his friends back in PA and show him the pictures she sent (twins, who are only less than a month younger than Carson, who he used to play with ALL the time at church) (it's sorta sad to me that he is missing out on all that)

Thomas Water Paint Activity pack for Carson

Coffee and Chocolates for me! Best/cheapest Coffee in the Whole Wide World

(you see my friend knows how much i like this,

and is thoughtful enough to supply

me with it every

once in a while. Now that

is a true friend)

Thomas Trains for Landon

There was something in there for Everyone! Richard got some recipes of food she makes that he loves. I guess I need to get cooking :)

P.S. I hope she doesn't mind that I show cased the package. And I hope this makes everyone want to send me a package so you can get mentioned on my blog. hahahahahaha jk.

It just once again brings me out of my feeling sorry for myself and makes me realize how truly blessed I am with the friends and people God has placed in my life.

Thank you from the bottom of my Heart

Beauty

2011-11-28T13:10:00.001-07:00

I titled this post "beauty" b/c I'm going to write about 2 things - Beauty in marriage, and Beauty in Colorado. :)

As I sit here during nap time with my zucchini muffin and coffee thinking about what to write - I am blessed and thankful. I might not always respond to situations or lack of a situation correctly - but ultimately I want to remember "the good things in life".

If you can see - I'm dying laughing! these kind of pics
just make me giggle! But still cute! :)

Marriage = Boy, where do I start. I'm am a thousand times thankful for my marriage and for my husband. It's amazing to me that way back in college I didn't even know how good it could be or how wonderful of a man Richard actually was, but boy am I glad we are together. Without going into detail about actually how wonderful Richard is and what I admire about him (b/c I doubt all the readers really care about that, suffice is to say he is THE BEST) I will just say that God has a perfect way of giving us pleasure and happiness in this life despite our sinfulness and selfishness and for that I am thankful.
Marriage truly is a beautiful thing. I in no way want to paint a perfect picture or say that we have a perfect relationship (we definitely have our moments especially when you decide to move across the country where you know no one or nothing) but to see how unconditional love and unconditional forgiveness is given to me in human form makes me appreciate so much more my salvation and relationship with Christ.

As we started our journey of 5 hours over the mountains to Western Colorado, Grand Junction, to spend thanksgiving with Richard's parents and extended family our thoughts and minds were flooded with memories of our first year of marriage when we lived in Grand Junction and drove parts of that road many times.

How much has changed.

How many memories we have.

How many stories we have.

Who we are now compared to who we were back then.

Joyful memories mostly of a blissful first year of marriage. But how rewarding to be able to look back and say how much more we love/know each other since then. How much God has molded us closer to his image through our marriage.

Now going back with our 2 kids is something different too! But what fun!

So we celebrated Thanksgiving with the family and ate tons of food and had a lot of fun catching up! Friday morning Richard and I decided to capitalize on babysitters and celebrate our 5 Year Wedding Anniversary.

It's wonderful to be in CO and have so many towns and places available to us to go and visit and see and do things. We drove straight to Aspen on friday and spent the afternoon and evening there. Boy is that a cool little mountain town. All i can say is a LOT of MONEY goes into that town and not very much comes out! :) It was fun to walk around and see things and look inside the stores. But definitely felt like everyone knew that we did not fit in that town. Over half the people there did not speak English (and it wasn't spanish either) and the stores were outrageaous. But fun to just explore and look around. We were able to find a "cheap" little local "diner" type place and got some GREAT food! (Spanikopita - I had never had that, but boy was it good)

Saturday we had the entire day - and boy let me tell you, when you have all day with no kids it feels like a whole week. Things get accomplished super fast, no timeline to operate by, and no naps, eating, diapering schedule, or buckling of a zillion seatbelts or strollers.

We first went to the resort with the Natural Hot Springs.(what the town is known for). Got a day pass. What a weird phenomenon that it is. Huge pools with water 104 degrees and 35 degrees outside the water, steam rolling off the water and people's bodies as they get out of the pool. Basically a bunch of people scantily clad standing around in hot water trying not to act like you're watching anyone, but not wanting to make conversation with the one you came with b/c you know everyone is listening. hahahahaha. But it felt so good! Pure minerals, hot water and a relaxing environment. (It was just so funny to look at the pool as you were getting in and see all the people).

After a while we went on a hike to "Hanging Lake" So Beautiful!!!! (this is where the beauty in CO comes in :) ) The path is about 1.2 miles long and pretty steep and as you got higher it got icier and snowier and colder. It was a little scary walking up and down trying not to slip b/c the last thing you needed on a vacation getaway was to end up with broken bones. it was a little treacherous but so worth it when you got to the top! Beautiful weather, beautiful scenery all around and all the way up the hike! It was amazing and so fun to do!

AFter our "vigorous" hike what better thing to do but to go back and soak in the natural spring water!!!!! So that's just what we did. Then we ate out again! Then went back at night! It was way nicer at night b/c between the dark and the steam it didn't feel quite as busy and a little more "private" but so relaxing!

Sunday we drove back to Rifle to meet up with the boys at the Church Richard's Father pastors. Spent the morning there and then ate lunch with them and drove back home over the mountains to Rifle.

What a Great weekend! One that we will remember always!

I love you Richard

Thanks for a great

5 years together!

Can't wait for the next 5 years of memories!

http://lovelinkin.com/2011/11/29/lovelinks-33-open/?utm_source=lovelinks+is+open&utm_campaign=6fe23eb1f3-lovelinks+%2333+campaign&utm_medium=email

Thanksgiving Day!

2011-11-25T08:43:00.001-07:00

We had a great day of celebration Yesterday!

Complete with a run (so I could eat guilt free), family, great food, sunshine and great company.

I have a lot of things for which to be thankful.

Onto our Anniversary Celebration!

Our Plans

2011-11-22T14:23:00.001-07:00

This is a time of year of much traveling and family gatherings! I love this time of year. The fact that it's a change of pace and schedules coupled with a road trip makes me super excited! I'm always up for a family trip and a change of pace. I get bored easily - so I am super excited for this week I can hardly stand it and am trying to enjoy today and not just look forward to tomorrow evening.

This year will be really different for us. It's our first year as a married couple or a family that we have been in CO to celebrate the holidays. Other years we have split between Richard's 2 siblings (and families) in PA and my sister (and whatever other of my family can make it) in PA. This year we are spending both holidays in Grand Junction. We are so excited to be able to go to Richard's homeland for this joyous season. (But I am also sad to be missing the family out East. I always feel pulled in so many directions. B/c also, 2 of my siblings will be in Ecuador with my parents and we were supposed to go too :( )

Anyways back to the week's plans -

Tomorrow night after Richard's work we will head out for a 5 hour trip to Grand Junction! I love road trips and it's been a good 3 months since our last one, so it's about time. hahahaha (I'm not even joking or being sarcastic at all!). We will spend Thanksgiving with Richard's parents, grandparents, and a few Aunts and Uncles. (I'm hoping to have plenty of babysitters for my daytime/warmtime runs). Other years I have cooked the turkey and much of the dinner (which I LOVE doing) but this year will be nice to not worry about very much. :)

Friday is our 5 year Anniversary! And if you haven't heard about that until now - where have you been?!??!? I'm super excited about it and feel like I've told everyone I see! ;) i love a good reason to celebrate. When we first picked our date for a wedding we knew it would interfere with Thanskgiving every year, but we secretly hoped it would provide good opportunity for Grandson/grandparent time! This is the first year it finally will work out. We will leave the boys with Richard's parents for 2 nights!!! Did you hear that???!!!? 2 NIGHTS!!!!
We plan to go to Glennwood Springs - which is a natural hot water springs town in the mountains!
Then meet up with the family again Sunday morning for church and after church drive back home!

I'm sure I will have plenty to write about after our trip - but until then

Happy Thanksgiving

And Happy Anniversary to US! :)

Entertainment for the day

2011-11-20T16:51:00.001-07:00

One day we had a crew of guys outside our house all day long cleaning up all the branches that feel after our 2 snow storms, and cleaning up all the leaves. Our parking lot had been a mess for a very long time which was a little annoying, so we were all thankful to see them cleaning it up. That's one nice aspect of living in an apartment Complex - we don't have to shovel or rake. :)
This day Carson sat at the window tons of time during the day just watching them work. He loved watching the big machines and the lawn mowers and things. He talked about them non stop. :)

Mail

2011-11-17T08:45:00.001-07:00

Many of you know my affinity towards mail! If not read here.

My mom also loves mail as you may have read if you clicked on the link above. and she is also the best person I know at sending mail. Nevertheless she cannot mail things very easily or with the ease of mind that it will actually get to the destination. But she is faithful to always mail things when she is stateside. She even leaves letters with other ppl asking them to mail it out to get to me on time for an occasion. I love that! It's so special to know she cares enough to think ahead and get it ready. She loves it.

Yesterday when checking the mail (almost a daily routine for us b/c we have to walk to the mail box on the other side of the parking lot of our complex) we were greeted with wonderful items in the mail.

The boys saw my excitement for the cards and in turn got all excited for them. Just picture me excitedly saying, "look what we got, it's so fun, open it" to them all giggling and smiley. They just look at me and smile too but have no idea what to do with it or what it is. :) They did carry the cards around for a few minutes and Carson even showed Daddy when he got home from work.

We also got an anniversary card and gift. And a cool advent calendar for the boys starting Dec. 1st. Which was a wonderful surprise. I cannot wait to do that with the boys this year. I think Carson will really get a kick out of it!!!!

Thank you Mum(that's what we call her from New england) for being so incredibly thoughtful. For taking the time to send us mail. and for making us all feel loved and special. We love you!!!!!

It's a daunting task

2011-11-15T13:20:00.001-07:00

Look at my two blessings!!!!!!
How could I ever get frustrated with those two little
ones running all around???!?!!?

Motherhood - is a daunting task! Well parenting in general, I can't forget that Richard also has a huge responsibility to raise children and feels the weight of it too.

I'm busy! I fail miserably! I get so selfish in my own desires and in turn get frustrated when my desires are interrupted.
There are days when I feel so irritated and frustrated at the events that happen. Or to be quite honest with you - listening to Carson talk literally NON-STOP. No break! and repeating himself a gazillion times. Do other toddlers do this? I have never heard a toddler talk/repeat as much as he does! How do I get it to be toned down a little???? (my natural reaction to things is getting frustrated, I rarely cry about anything, but I get "mad" very easily about situations, i always wish i cried instead, it seems less sinful)

Now that Carson is getting older I'm sensing the urgency to teach him about life and godliness. He understands and speaks so much! To teach him about the wonderful God who gave his only son, to redeem us, even though we do not deserve it. About a Loving God who desires our hearts praise and obedience. A God who I want to serve with my whole heart, and love and praise, THE KING- but also the God that I fail daily, minutely. How do I teach him these things?
I've heard it said before we have to breathe it all day long for it to overflow from us. But I fail at that. It's so daunting to me this huge responsibility. I realize as days pass me by that I have already failed.

But this is where the good news comes in. God is bigger than me. He gives me wisdom to handle the situations and he can calm my heart and mind. I have the Holy Spirit in me to guide me and help me throughout the day. And God's ways are bigger than my ways. His Will will be done despite myself. And I will revel in his goodness and grace towards me, b/c I know that if any good happens in this household it is not b/c of me or my "good parenting" but b/c God is gracious to me to give me that gift. I just need to trust Him and obey him and show my children love.

I compare my "parenting skills" to other mothers or families and I am either encouraged or very discouraged. I need to just focus on our lives and what my boys need from me.
I pray that I don't waste this precious time with them. I pray that they see, through their mother and father, a loving God that wants to see them accept his gift, . It's daunting to say the least - and I feel very inadequate or "not godly enough" to be the one to teach them these things. I wonder if we have enough purpose in our parenting (sometimes I feel like we are flying by the seat of our pants for each new "fit" that happens) - but I need to trust God, I need to learn and obey his Word.

Any advice?

Here's to trusting God to poor grace into our lives despite this sinful mother!!!

Linking up with women living well

Every Mother has to have one

2011-11-14T12:35:00.001-07:00

A picture of her baby sleeping at the Lunch Table that is! I must say I think this is the first time this has happened! Poor little guy. He is transitioning to no morning nap, but obviously still needs one some days. This weekend was pretty busy for him, and I knew he was so tired this morning but didn't lay him down thinking he would sleep good this afternoon for me. But poor guy - couldn't make it. It is 11:54am at this point, so I put him down to bed and moved Carson's naptime up earlier too! Here's to hoping they both still sleep a lot time.

I surivved!!!

2011-11-11T13:38:00.001-07:00

Well folks - I am overjoyed that Richard made it home safely. some of you might take this post as me being a wimp, and I'm completely aware that my circumstances are very minimal compared to many of my friends who this happens to a lot. But Richard was gone for about one night and two days.

First off - let me say - I hate sleeping by myself. In my younger days I was seriously scared a lot!!!! and even growing up drove my sisters nutzo b/c I always wanted to sleep in their room and not my own. I have since "grown up" and also recognized my sinfulness in being so afraid and that God is always with me and loves me and protects me, but that was a long road and one that I sometimes still battle. But God has given me a lot of grace.
Very few times has Richard left me in our marriage, like probably only 2 or 3 counting this time. And those times I just planned to visit my sister for that time. I'm usually the one that leaves. And it's much easier when I leave with the kiddos b/c I'm going to my sister's house, or with my mom, or with family or friends. It's a whole other story when he leaves and I'm stuck at home. :(

He was flying to somewhere in Ohio, like Columbus or something, getting picked up by a random man (he did this with another co-worker) who sold 2 box trucks to his boss here in CO. Then as soon as they did the transfer of titles etc they started the long trek back to CO. He flew out on Weds morning and got home around midnight last night! Boy - was he tired. It was almost our move all over again, like 20 hrs or something like that. (it did take them a little longer than that I think)

I knew the trip was coming up and I did try to see if anyone I knew (which is not that many ppl) wanted to stay with me. Nothing ended up working out, and I would never ask a friend to leave their husband to come stay with me. Overall though, the time was fine and nothing major happened, and I'm pretty sure the boys hardly noticed.

I drove down to take him to airport then back again. We went to the park for lunch. Then to the library. I wanted to exchange some books and we ended up getting the movie "UP". (He loved that movie) That night good friends invited us for dinner which was so nice b/c I would've just cooked Mac and Cheese. :) When we came home I put Landon to bed, and Carson and I made popcorn and watched part of the movie. He was in Heaven. :)
Thurs morning - he watched the end of the movie while eating pancakes (a sure treat in our house, usually that's a dinner commodity). It was a beautiful day out, so we enjoyed lunch at the park again for a while. Both days boys slept great during naps, and at night and for that I'm extremely thankful.
We made a "welcome home" sign with water colors for Daddy and had a long bubble bath and let them play for a while.
I tried to accomplish very little throughout the days and really just enjoyed spending time with the boys - trying not to watch the clock in anticipation to Richard's arrival. I noticed that made a huge difference b/c they had my attention and I was not stressed about accomplishing certain things.
He did get home very late, around midnight, last night. He was tired and drove a very long time in an uncomfortable Box Truck.

he is home and back at work again. and we are thankful to have him home.

I survived one night by myself in our house and actually I slept pretty good and didn't "fret" too much about anything. I honestly don't know how my friends do that for extended period of times and often. I know that is so much work for one person. I admire you all. (and you all really think I'm a wimp too ) I hope that it does get a little easier with time though. For now - I will enjoy the Richard's company and help even more!

2011-11-09T22:29:00.000-07:00

Been struggling with what to write recently. We haven't been doing much exciting, and I have been very uninspired about what to write. I fear sounding pessimistic and "unbiblical" and don't want to offend people or sound too self consumed.

A little about what's going on -
-We've been staying busy having people over to our house, watching football games, eating food and also enjoying the social things that take place. Getting to know wonderful people.
-I've been keeping up running - the cold and dark make it hard. But today I found a group to run with on weds mornings, so that makes me happy.
-Richard's work is going great! He has had a few more late nights and unexpected things -which is to be expected - and we are thankful for the work and the provision for our family.
-Landon is 14 months old, yesterday! I cannot believe it. (time for another one, :) jk, sorta hahahaha) He is still so sweet and so cute. Although he is getting a little feistier and showing his opinion more - he is still so laid back and easy going. He is walking like crazy and it really is the cutest thing ever. Brightens my day every day!

this just makes me laugh!

-Carson's little stint of "draining my parents of all confidence and energy" has calmed down. I'm pleased to let you all know - our days are much more peaceful and filled with much more obedience choices and for that I am very thankful.

I love this smile!

-Richard is on his first "business trip" (first time for me that I could not go to my sister's house :( ). We tried to enjoy our time with going to library, watching a special movie way past our bedtime, eating lunch at a park, and we plan to not do much else tomorrow waiting for him to come home. :)
-we really love living back in CO, and especially Fort Collins. It is a great city to move to.
-I miss the comfort-ability in relationships that I had in PA, but I'm also excited for the new ones here in CO. It's a process and teaches me my selfishness and how much I need to depend on God for my joy and satisfaction, and not relationships with friends or my husband. (this by the way is a very long process that for sure I have not accomplished, even close, but I'm a work in progress)
-did I mention in about 14 days we will be celebrating our 5 year anniversary???!?!!! yeah, can you tell I'm excited. I love to look forward to and celebrate any milestone. I think we actually might get to do something special too - more on that to come. :)

He truly is my best friend
and Love of my life

-Have been convicted and challenged and encouraged a lot lately on my attitude towards Motherhood, enjoying the moments, understanding the privilege it is. I've been contemplating so much how the mother sets the tone for the household, how much of a responsibility I have to raise these children. Mulling a lot of that sorta stuff over. But nothing too concrete to share with you all. Not very eloquent tonight.

Ok - that's enough rambling. Maybe next post will be a little more exciting. Until then - have a good week everyone. It's late and I should head to bed now! sweet dreams!

Should I be?

2011-11-07T14:42:00.000-07:00

Stressed that is? Should I be stressed? Or should I be doing something that I'm not?

I've been reading all over Facebook about everyone getting all their Christmas shopping done, and even wrapping their presents already, and their Christmas cards done and probably mailed out too!!!! I was really started to get STRESSED out about not getting on the ball.

But - FOR ME - i decided to just RELAX about it all. I will get it all done. Sure there is a lot to get done, but I want to enjoy the days and enjoy the season. I get so annoyed at the commercialism of Christmas, stores started selling decorations a LONG time ago, places are already decorating for Christmas. For Pete's sake!!!! Settle down a little!

I like to enjoy fall - Thanksgiving, and our anniversary. (it's our 5 year anniversary, so we're going to live it up big :) ) (in our own simple little way hehehehe)

Maybe come December I will wish i did more ahead of time. But it really doesn't take me that long to send out my Christmas cards. (like one night of ordering them, and 2 nights of addressing and labeling them) the present buying is just a matter of brainstorming and buying and then mailing out or wrapping. No Big Deal, right? :)

Christmas can be a really busy time of year, but I want to enjoy it still. I want to NOT be frantic and do it simple. Enjoy decorating the house, enjoy all the extra baking and party-going. And especially i want to enjoy Fall!

Should I be stressed out about Christmas already?????
Everyone is different and everyone has busy lives in different areas. It would stress me out too much to start doing things already for way longer time. Other's like to have it done so they don't not worry about it later. So to each their own. But I decided for ME - to sit back, blog a little, read a few books with the boys, smell a little fall candle, go for a run, and face the Christmas Chaos after our anniversary.

p.s. I hope I don't regret this. :)
p.s.s. no that picture is not taken from me, I googled an image, but it is fall in CO :)

2nd snow of the season (already)

2011-11-02T13:39:00.000-06:00

First of all - this first picture is of my baby. We cut his hair last night. It was getting so long in the back and covering his eyes. I was all ready for it. And as soon as I did it - i regretted it. he looks so grown up and different to me!!!!!!! I was so sad. he is still a cutie though!!!!

Last night it snowed again! Exactly a week ago we had like the same or a little more amount of snow fall. But then, the leaves were still on the trees so tons of trees fell over and stuff. This time it wasn't quite so bad. Wow! I'm psyched - the first snow falls are so much fun.
But I must admit today - I really wanted to just stay inside and lay on the couch. But with two toddlers - that's not really an option. And I'm almost sure that Carson knew that b/c he has had SUPER amount of energy today!!!!! Our poor neighbor below us. :(

Anyways - the sun did come out, so I started the process of putting on the snow gear! (which btw - last week we didn't even have out or know where it was. :) ) But now we are prepared. And my plan worked b/c as soon as we came in and took off all the "stuff" Carson said, "I'm tired" and went and laid down on his bed after cleaning up his toys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Trucking through the snow

the parking lot of our apartment Complex

I love his tongue out in this picture

Brothers

Last year Carson hated the winter. He would not even go close to the snow and cried all the time. he would not even walk outside - we had to carry him to the car all the time, and into buildings. He would just stand there cold!!!!! This year is another whole story - he loves it. He was throwing snow balls, walking through it, chasing me with snow! It was fun to watch. Now if only one of these times we can go sledding with daddy! That will be so much fun!

I hope you're having a good Wednesday!!!!

Pirates and Lions Oh My!

2011-11-01T14:23:00.001-06:00

I'm one of those party pooper moms who hates dressing up. :( I never have enjoyed dressing up for parties and almost hate doing it. I like to think I'm not creative at all - but really it's b/c I don't like to put the effort into it.

Also growing up in Ecuador - Halloween was not celebrated and really dressing up and costumes is not really part of the culture at all. So I'll blame it on that too.

And now to think I need to think about it for my kids too - ugh! was my first reaction. i also did not want to spend a lot of money, but didn't want just one of those suits you buy in the store either. So I perused the shelves and just hoped that I would find something cheap and that I could make work. I also had no real intentions of doing it up big and no party was planned so I knew it was no big deal. As time came closer my friend, Jamie (who has a 2 yr old), told me that "Old Town" (downtown area) was having a time for stores to hand out candy to kids from 10am-1pm on the 31st. So i decided to go, but then I sorta had to get serious about costumes too.

Hat and vest - $1 from target's $1 sections
Bandana -1$ at thrift store
White shirt -$1 thrift store
and i wont' tell you the sword b/c I hated spending that
much but we needed it for the outfit - then
I lost it anyways and had to buy another one - which was cheaper :)

They did so good

Carson with his friend Noah (jamie's son)
A pirate and a Monkey

My little lion
Jamie let me borrow the ears and tail
They were lioness accessories but we didn't use the bow :)
yellow pj's -$1.50 thrift store
(It was actually a bumble bee but I cut off the bumble bee part, his feet
actually say BUZZ on them :) )
Black eye liner -$1 (b/c I don't have any )

I think they look pretty good and cute for our
first halloween Trick or Treating :)

He did so good just taking one - and saying thank you
and following me.
It was so much fun for me to see him
really though - he just wanted to eat that piece right away
he didn't get the concept of getting more candy
He just kept wanting me to open them right away
But it was still so fun!

He really wanted more and more candy
(have you seen this kid eat??????)
so I tried to appease him with saltines
thankfully it worked ok

My friend Jamie
The only person I knew before coming here
And I'm so glad for her friendship!
(and we live in the same complex so
I hang out with her ALL THE TIME)

I had so much fun during the day with the boys and with my friends - that i decided we would go out that night around our neighborhood so that Richard could join us. I was like a little kid so excited about this whole experience.

I think the funnest part for me as the parent was everyone's reaction to your kids. They all say how cute they are, and are so happy to see them. It was so much fun watching the boys try to pick out one candy, and the adults just thinking it was adorable when Carson would say "thank you".

I also thought - What a perfect way to meet people in your community. We stopped by an older ladies apartment who I've met and talked to - just to say hi with the boys, and she was so encouraged and thankful that we would stop by and see her for Halloween. What a great testimony to her that I actually care about her and think about her. Another lady - remembered handing candy out in "old town" (she works in a store) and remembered our boys and then talked about where we live and was so friendly. It really was great!!!!

We walked around for about an hour or so with Jamie and Gary and just laughed at the boys and had a great time! By far the funnest Halloween ever!!!!!

I'll have to post pics of our night out once I get copies of them - we took pics with Jamie's camera. :)

Blog Bash 2011

2011-10-27T14:08:00.002-06:00

I love a good party - and since we just moved - These are the only parties I'm invited to lately. (hahha, i'm just kidding, people here are so wonderful and we are fitting in nicely). I'm linking up over at Women Living Well Blog bash!

This is the most recent updated picture of my family

So that's a little about myself already. My name is Jessica. I grew up as a missionary kid in Ecuador since I was 2. I tell you that b/c that has completely shaped who i am today, how I think, and my desires for my kids. My parents are still living there. I went to a small bible college and there met the man of my dreams who took a while to realize I was in front of his nose. :) he finally did come to his senses and noticed one of his best friends would make a "fun" wife, so we got married November 2006. (Yup, soon will be 5 yr anniversary). He is from Western Colorado and we lived in his home town for about 10 months before we moved across the country to Scranton PA. We had a wonderful almost 4 yrs there and met tons of wonderful friends and people who shaped our lives, all while Richard attended Seminary. In may of this year, he got his masters, so we had to think of what we wanted to do next. Oh yeah, we also had 2 kids while we were there. :) Carson is 2 and half, and Landon 13 months. We had a great community of young families in our church and it was the perfect setting for us to start ours with so much wisdom and support there.

To make a long story short we decided July 2011 to move by faith to Fort Collins CO, to help out a church plant called The Crossing. So August 13th we packed up our truck and pulled out of the place where my 2 children were born. It was a huge move, and Richard did not have a job at first, and we only knew one couple in Fort Collins. It's been so amazing to watch God provide a job for Richard, and you can read that story here. To be completely calm and sure that God led us here, and watch details work out both in the church and in our lives. To see how God is molding us and changing us and using us, bringing Glory to Himself, has been amazing and just what we needed as a family. And slowly we are gaining new friends. Although we miss our good friends in PA, we have great people here that we are getting to know so well and enjoying that.

I recently wrote a big blog about why I blog, you can go here to read about that. And please do, b/c I really was able to share my heart there.
I usually blog in the afternoon while both my boys are napping. And I truly cherish that time. I love being able to share my heart and read great stories about other's lives. I guess you can say it's my outlet for the day. :)

I love my boys to death but am learning so much about this whole parenting thing. I love staying at home with them and spending my days with them. It's not always easy and i easily get frustrated but I would never change my circumstances right now. It's wonderful to have the flexibilty to go out or help others in need. And I truly want these days that I am at home to be profitable for my boys, for me, and for others.

I would love for you to join us on our journey as we help in the church, learn how to live this life glorifying God, and living in Grace that he graciously bestows on us. I would love for you to watch as we make Fort Collins our new home, and see how God provides for our daily needs. And we absolutely love being back in Colorado!

I'm also linking up at Fall Followers Fest over at "The Wiegands" and that link up party! Lots of parties to attend this time of year. So exciting. Hope to see you back soon. :)

Parenting

2011-10-25T13:40:00.001-06:00

Some of you know I've been pretty discouraged lately about parenting issues with Carson. He is a normal 2 year old and he has really been pushing the limits for a few months now, and it just kept getting worse and worse.
There was one night I said to Richard, "I think it really would be easier to just give up, let him do whatever he wants all day and not listen to the screaming fits all day long". I really considered that. I felt defeated, like a terrible mother, and at a complete loss of how to handle his sinful nature and direct him towards obedience. I saw so much anger and frustration in my heart and mind that I was completely discouraged. I couldn't overcome the frustration and patience that had run out!
Richard has been so encouraging to me, and praying for both of us about this issue. I have been seeking God for wisdom and strength every day. I know this sounds a little ridiculous but I just didn't know if i had any more patience in me to go through another day.

Now I also realize that Carson has had a crazy few weeks that hasn't helped the situation. He was sick a few weeks ago, then hadn't been napping or sleeping well at nights, then we had visitors, a trip to MN, a weekend away, and going out all the time. We were hardly just at home for more than a day, and his schedule was all messed up. So I know this played a huge part.

Well this weekend and this week so far, I have really concentrated on the sleeping issue and the routine aspect of our lives. And I can see the fruits of it, I think.

This week I have begged God for wisdom, asked my mom for help, asked friends for help, and Richard and I have talked a lot about it!
Today my friends (and even yesterday) i have seen a different young man. Who knows why, but I'm thankful for the break. He has been pretty compliant, and so very pleasant, playing with his toys, sitting with me to read books, etc. I have made a huge effort to spend some quality time with him, to remain calm and patient in what could escalate to a terrible situation with him, and I'm happy to say, today has been a good day. God has graciously given us all the Grace that we needed and a little break from all these fits and disobedience lately.

A friend from the past sent me a little note on Facebook the other day, and she was so encouraging. She also attached a prayer from a book called "the power of a praying parent". I haven't read the book and also don't know much about the author or anything, but this prayer was so encouraging to me. And I will paste it here for all to read!

Lord, I submit myself to You. I realize that parenting a child in the wayYou would have me to is beyond my human abilities. I know I need You to help me. I want to partner with You and partake ofYour gifts of wisdom, discernment, revelation, and guidance. I also need Your strength and patience, alongwith a generous portion of Your love flowing through me. Teach me how to love the way You love. Where I need to be healed, delivered, changed,matured, or made whole, I invite You to do that in me. Help me to walk in righteousness andintegrity before You. Teach me Yourways, enable me to obey You commandments and do only what is pleasing in Yoursight. May the beauty of Your Spirit beso evident in me that I will be a godly role model. Give me the communication, teaching andnuturing skills that I must have. Makeme the parent You want me to be and teach me how to pray and truly intercedefor the life of this child. Lord, Yousaid in Your Word, “Whatever things you ask in prayer, believing, you willreceive” (Matthew 21:22). In Jesus’ name I ask that You will increasemy faith to believe for all the things You’ve put on my heart to pray forconcerning this child.

I know that being a parent is such a privilege. God has been burdening my heart with how much a mother's attitude and countenance affects and directs the household, and that is where I was getting so discouraged b/c I felt so inadequate in this area. But I know God gives me grace, he forgives, and gives strength to overcome my sinful flesh - and for that I am humbled and thankful and leaning on Him. Seriously I think I'm learning more about life and godliness than my boys are!

Fall family Pictures

2011-10-24T14:24:00.002-06:00

Apparently we were too busy on Saturday and all the events wore my family out! Saturday night around dinner time, Landon started throwing up. yup, you heard that right! I know what all of you are thinking - weren't you guys just sick? Do you not eat healthy? Why are you guys always sick? I know, I know, I'm just as dumbfounded and annoyed at this as you are. Later that night Richard got very sick!!! So no church for us.

If you can believe it or not, when we were sick 2 weeks ago, we missed our "Porterbrook" session, and Sunday AM we missed another one before church. I think our Pastor might think we are doing something on purpose. Our new church friends must think that we are always sick. And truthfully we are lately. It's so weird, b/c i don't think we are sick this often.

I know when you move to a new place you are susceptible to sickness, b/c of different viruses and bugs in that area, so i was prepared for us to be "cold" sick a lot this winter. but not stomach sick so many times in the fall!!!!! But oh well. I guess I'll have to swallow my pride and admit that "yes, we are sick again, and try as I might to be clean and healthy it still happened to us".

So our plans of Porterbrook training, church, then date night were all canceled. And we spent the day inside as a family with football, movies, chicken noodle soup, ginger ale, and saltines all day!!!! YUCK!!

By about 5pm Richard was doing better and Landon was too. We all needed a little fresh air and change of scenery so we got dressed and headed to a near by park. It was perfect temperature out. And we took our annual Fall Family Pictures. I told Richard that I really want to set this as a tradition. I just love fall so much, and I think it will be great to get good fall pics every year to keep our family pictures updated. (but we did find it hard to work with a timer and the boys). I think we got a couple good ones at least.

Cutie even if he wasn't feeling the greatest

Such a ham

I love you Richard!

Galloping Goose 10K

2011-10-22T17:01:00.001-06:00

Today was the "long"-awaited 10K race! I had the privilege of starting off with my awesome Sister in Law! My Goal starting out this year was to run a 10K before the winter came, and when we decided to move I wondered if it would really happen. Thankful that my sis in law took the initiative to find this race for us so we had something to aim towards. :) Once you register there is no turning back.

I also had been training pretty good until about 2 weeks before the race. i felt confident in it until then. :( B/c we were so busy it was hard to get good runs in, so I was a little unprepared. Also something I didnt' take into consideration was that the course was all gravel. This really makes a difference - less traction or something, i was way more tired than usual. Plus the course seemed exceptionally hilly. With a huge hill on mile 1 and 4 and then many smaller rolling hills the rest of the run! I was pretty exhausted by the end. I had wanted to make it under an hour and i really wanted to do about a 56 minutes or less. Sadly I could not accomplish any of my goals. :( Maybe I should learn to not underestimate running in Colorado, see here.

I ran it in 1 hour and 9 sec. avg pace 9:39 min mile

6th in my age category

46th overall

(there were not that many runners)

I guess I'm happy with 6th in my age category. :) (18-29)

Autumn and I before the race
nervous but ready

Carson had so much fun playing with his Cousin Aspen

I love these next few pictures:

Landon 13 months, Axel 10 months (twins) :)

I love how they are looking at each other

I love his hand on landon's back

Finishing very tired
But loved hearing Carson yelling
"mommy" as I came through the finish line

Autumn finishing well

After our race we went straight to the Denver Zoo! It's a great Zoo! And beautiful weather! The first time we've taken the boys and it was so fun!

See the tiger to the left of them?

There really is a polar bear behind us :)
Look at Landon's great smile!

Then they rode the Carousel ride at the end!
It was fun to spend the day with family. We were all tired after a few hours of the Zoo and we only saw about half of it! But it was still such a great day!

Now I'm at home resting. :)

Minneapolis

2011-10-21T09:33:00.000-06:00

I had the wonderful opportunity to fly out last Saturday to see my Younger sister, her new baby, Dominic, and my mother who flew in to help her. I was so thankful for how the trip worked out, how God provided for us, and the timing was perfect. I always hate leaving Richard and it is a lot of work to travel with my 2 boys by myself, but it was all totally worth it!

Grammie and her newest Grandson

We had a direct flight to MN and I was so thankful for that. The boys did relatively ok but didn't sleep at all. Carson had to go to the bathroom once, but the nice stewardess was helpful and held Landon for me. (boy did not realize how tiny those bathroom are until you try to take a toddler in there with you!).

Grammie with her 2nd youngest Grandson

Sweet, sweet Dominic!

So while we were there, we had a great time galavanting all around. We went out to eat to my mom's favorite Olive Garden and a cool French Bakery place. We had Caribou coffee often and really Lived IT UP! :) My sister lives 2 miles from the mall of America and an IKEA. So you guessed it, we spent a lot of time there. :) I could not get over how HUGE the MofA is!!!! So HUMUNGOUS! We could've walked around there forever it felt like. There was so much to see and do for the boys. it was a lot of fun.

They had a whole lego place that they boys loved right beside the amusement park. Carson kept going back and forth from playing with legos to looking at the "trains" (rollercoasters) that kept zooming by us.

Landon loved all the baby things to cra

Carson's "nap" time :)

The boys got very little sleep the whole trip. And we all know how that aids to toddlerhood "tantrums". But we survived. I was so happy when they fell asleep in the stroller so we could shop longer. Basically the only naps they got was in the car rides or the stroller, so we made sure to take our time walking around IKEA to ensure a good long nap. :)

They flights back weren't as smooth as on the way there. The boys were very tired and mommy was tired. I could go on about how figitey a 1 year old is on your lap and how hard airports are when they are crowded and only snack foods all day for the boys, but when I step back and think about it, overall it went as good as can be expected. I had nice men sitting next to me each plane ride, and the last one (which the boys did the worst on) he was the nicest and most helpful. Carson obeyed through security, and on and off the planes which is when I really needed him to stay with me and pay attention. (since at those times he was not strapped into stroller). And even the delays that seemed annoying, turned out better in the long run. So overall a good trip.

But needless to say I was a tired momma falling into Richard's arms at the airport. I literally brought one sleeping baby inside the house and went straight to bed, while Richard brought the rest of the stuff in. Thank goodness for men. :)
It was wonderful to see my sister and see the new baby, and see her in her new role as a mother. She will be the best mother for Dominic and I'm so happy for her to experience the joys and intense love and emotion of motherhood.

Now tomorrow is my big 10 K race! I was not able to train the last 2 weeks as much as I would've liked. :( Up until last week, i was training well and felt good about the race, but since then it's been up and down. I did run 2 times while in MN for about 4 and half miles at a good pace. So let's hope that keeps me going during the race. I will admit I'm a little burnt out from running and look forward to the break when this race is done. I have high goals set for the race, and I'm nervous about meeting them. But in the end, it's all about enjoyment, so I need to try to keep my focus on enjoying it. Don't worry - I'll be sure to let you all know how it goes. :)
Meanwhile - gotta get the boys taken care of and our lives back in order from the trip. boys need some serious restful activities. (who am I kidding, momma needs that more :) )

Fun Fall Activity

2011-10-20T14:19:00.002-06:00

Fall is a lot of People's favorite season! And I will have to also jump on the bandwagon and say that it is mine also. I love this time of year. I get very grumpy in the hot, sweaty weather. And probably the only things I love about summer are less socks to wash and match, and the sun shining more often.

Fall in CO is proving to be wonderful. So sunny! Little rain (so far anyways) and beautiful fresh air to breathe in. Perfect for jeans and sweatshirts and cuddle time with the family in evenings and early mornings, but good nice "park day" weather during the day.

As you've probably noticed around here - we've had a busy schedule. (read previous post). But boy was it tons of fun so far! It started out last week, Wednesday. In the evening Richard's parents came to town. I love that they get to see our boys more often, and I really love that Carson especially really recognizes them and responds so well to them.

On Friday of last week, we all went down to Denver to spend some good time with more family. Richard's brother and his 2 kids and wife live there. And also Richard's sister and her brand new husband. :) (welcome to the family, Chris)

We went to a beautiful place called Hudson Gardens. It was the perfect warm sunny fall day. So much for the boys to do. Running around in the pretty flowers, watching the train go around the tracks, playing in the pumpkin patch. So much fun! I love fall activities.

Cool Fountain

train going around
on train tracks

Afterwards we went out to eat together. Although the boys were super tired from the day's activities we had a great time as a family! We love being so close to more family members - but we really do miss the 3 families we left behind in PA. Too bad we have to all live so far away! It is a sad part of life. Thankful for technology to make it easier.

Stay tuned for more "stories" of our latest adventures

Busy Busy Busy

2011-10-13T13:12:00.001-06:00

This week and next week are choc full of activities.

The week started pretty slow but quickly picked up. Tuesday night we had one of the Pastors and his wife over for dinner. (although that was not hard b/c they brought it to us! How wonderful). WE had a great time chatting with them and getting to know them.

Wednesday I had a mommy park date with a few moms from our church. WE are slowly trying to build up this group of woman and encourage each other. It was perfect weather for it, and we had a great time.
Last night my in laws arrived. What a joy to see Carson now recognizing them and interacting with them since we can see them a little more frequently now that we live only 5 hrs from them. (his age might help with that too) but what a joy to have them in our house.

Today I'm taking a meal to a wonderful new mother in our church, then fixing dinner for us and my in laws, then we have our life group tonight. Full of activity and I love it.

Tomorrow we head down to Denver to spend the day with our other family that lives there and cousins. So happy to be able to see these family members more often (although, boy do we miss the two families out East, and Carson misses those cousins too, I hate that we have to live so far away from someone, and we can't all live close to everyone, in Colorado of course. hehehe) Richard will meet us down in Denver for dinner and I'm pretty sure we are going to Casa Bonita!!!!! (it's been since childhood I think since I've been to that restaurant, and it is a great experience especially for kids, if you're in the area with kids, try to go there, it's a trademark)
On Saturday I will be flying out to Minneapolis with the boys to see my mother and sister who just had her very first baby!!!!! (Congrats! Juli you're doing great as a new mom) i cannot wait to spend this time with my sister and mother, although the trip out there does make me a little nervous. Richard will stay home and hold down the fort for us, and be responsible and work. :)

I get back late Wednesday. We are busy on Thursday and Friday night with activities and then Saturday the 22nd is my big 10K race! WOW! I feel ready now, but have no idea how I will keep it up with being gone and being so busy. So let's hope the training I did ahead of time will pay off with a week and half small break. I hope to at least run 3 more times before next weekend, we'll see if I can pull it off.

So needless to say - I"M BUSY!!!!!!!!!!!!
My boys are sensing it too - they are really off their rockers since they were sick last weekend, and since mommy is a little stressed out. so we'll see how it goes. Lots of fun things, but busy things.
I probably won't be posting much = but I hope to post pictures of all the activities and things as soon as I can!

the last 3 days

2011-10-08T09:03:00.001-06:00

Ok - I know rule number one is to not post pictures of poor quality - but sometimes that's all I got - so please ignore the poor phone quality pictures.

So many things wrong with this picture

Note:

1. Flip flops on the table ??????

2. 1 yr old standing on an object with wheels

3. 1 yr old probably eating stale gross food from his high chair

4. literally seconds after this, the blur of a 2 yr odl pulled the object out from underneath him

5. mother standing by taking picture

6. cup on table, probably has gross spoiled milk in it.

We have had some sickness in this household :(
It makes a mother's heart so sad to see her kids sick. First it started out with Landon on weds late afternoon barfing all over himself in the stroller very unexpectedly. He made it almost 24 hrs before he threw up again and it was so sad. He was a trooper though, and the only thing he really demanded was lots of cuddles - I'm not complaining about that. Friday Carson woke up and shortly after starting barfing. :( poor kid. It's so sad seeing him hate it so much. All you can do is hold him and say "it's ok", "I love you". and hold him as tight as possible. But by evening he was full of energy again.

Richard and I are feeling under the weather last night and today but we hope that's all we experience. So I've been homebound for what feels like a VERY LONG TIME! We all know how that makes me feel. :)
But I can't help but appreciate the fact that I CAN stay home with them, that I can set everything else aside and sit on the couch all day long with them. And all I need to worry about is my 2 boys staying hydrated.

(Tonight my friends is something very special planned! I'll be sure to post it as soon as I can. Just hoping that we all stay healthy enough to enjoy it)

talkative? what an understatement

2011-10-06T15:09:00.001-06:00

"I can't wait until Carson can talk to us" Richard would say to me often about 8 months ago.

Well Folks! HE CAN TALK NOW!!!!!

He talks non stop. His personality is full of energy and he is sometimes CRAZY!!!!
he repeats things like a million times before he moves onto something else. He requires a response to it each time he says it. And he definitely says whatever comes to his mind.
He points out EVERY SINGLE airplane in the sky, or you know those trail of clouds they leave behind? yeah, he notices every single one of those too. Anytime we are outside or in the car - he is not only saying, but YELLING - "mommy see an airplane, mommy see an airplane?" It's always very loud and excited!
he has no sense of "try not to interrupt" when mommy's talking on phone, to a friend or to daddy. I sorta feel bad b/c he requires the same constant responses from other's he meets, and they don't realize it, he just starts getting more animated and louder and repeating more! ha
His biggest thing right now is "mommy, watch this, watch this mommy, mommy watch this"
My response - "ok, I'm watching" (I have to say it EVERY TIME)
then he does something as simple as literally lifting his finger, or moving his foot, or touching something, or doing something so silly! He wants me to watch everything. As frustrating and annoying as that is, I never want to ignore him or not treat him respectfully.
But boy - it gets tiring.

Richard and I laugh sometimes b/c his energy and talking can get very tiring and overwhelming. At dinner we both look at each other and say "boy, this kid is crazy" He never walks anywhere, it's always running. He never sets anything down gently, he throws it or drops it.

He can be exhausting to me throughout the day, and I'm feel guilty b/c there are some days I'm just dying to put him down for a nap or to bed. he literally is going NON STOP all day long!

But - I wouldn't change him for the world!!!!! He has so much spunk and so much energy it's contagious. He walks into the room and screams something like "I see Noah (his new friend)" or "I want a donut" (at church for fellowship time) or "I went pee on the potty" and the whole room turns and looks at him and laughs. He is already lighting up the room with happiness when he walks into it. Now that is a great trait to have, my friends. What a gift he has to be so easily excited and so easily entertained and so happy all (well most) of the time.

He makes his Friends and people we hang out with feel so welcome b/c he loves them all! he gets so excited when they come to our house or he sees them at church. What a gift! How many people can make you feel so warm and loved? Well, just become Carson's friend and he will for sure!

Sure there are days when I wish he would be calm or be a little quieter, but I can't help but laugh and smile when I see how excited he gets about literally EVERY LITTLE THING!

And you know what?!?! It's contagious! You can't help but smile when you see his excitement. And I think anyone who meets him would say the same!
Sure I can compare him to other calm kids and wonder what did I do differently to make Carson like this. But really he is a GIFT! He is 100% about everything he does, or doesn't do. No medium ground - and I LOVE THIS ABOUT HIM!

P.S. I've already prepared myself for plenty of embarrassing moments in the future in public settings with things he'll say. :)

Porterbrook

2011-10-05T14:51:00.000-06:00

Here at our church, The Crossing, we have gotten involved in this leadership training program called Porterbrook Network. Two men from England put it together and it's wonderful curriculum. I'll stop writing about it before I sound too dumb. I actually don't know too much about it, but Richard thought it would be a good way for us to get to know people and learn more things and get involved so I agreed to go through the course. This is also the first time the church has gone through the curriculum, so we're all learning about it together. It is a little demanding on our time, but not excessive. There is weekly "homework" and things to read and write about. We meet together in small groups to discuss what we've been learning and once a month all meet together to have a formal teaching time through the material. There are parts of it that are "way over my head" or just require more thinking that I've gotten accustomed to, (you know b/c I'm a mom and just blog all day and don't do anything that involves thinking, hahahahahaha please note sarcasm) but some parts are so encouraging and exciting. Overall it's been great. The material is very informative and helpful but also very practical. I'm learning how to better understand my bible, how to talk with my community and engage them on what I believe, and also am encouraged in my own relationship with God.

This last week we were looking at "the cross" and what that meant to us."Following Jesus means following the way of the cross" (taken from the text in Luke 9:23) What did Jesus do for us on the cross? He gave up everything for us. We looked at John 13:1-17, the passage of Jesus' washing the disciples feet before he was crucified. We meditated on what that act meant in that culture and what is the equal to it for nowadays, and we contemplated the facts that Jesus had all power, he knew what was going to happen, and yet he chose to do the one thing that in that time frame spoke of utter service to someone. And he even washed the feet of the one who would betray him. (which btw He knew that also) How convicting to me. A quote from the workbook - "Christ's love for us, in his sacrificial giving of himself, is our model as we seek to live "a life of love". (I think that pretty much sums up this paragraph) The Cross should affect every aspect of our lives especially with how we deal with people in our daily/weekly lives - Humbly serving, sacrificial.

Then it moved onto looking to the cross for our acceptance. This was the best part for me because I can tend to feel guilty about what I do or don't do. How much I do or don't do - but none of that affects what the "cross" means for me. "We are accepted by God so that we might be free to follow the way of the cross" and we don't follow the way of the cross to be accepted. We are under "no condemnation" b/c of the cross - Jesus took our place. In talking in our small group, a friend mentioned she had heard that once we are saved we should never think about condemnation - we need to be convicted but never feel condemnation. How Freeing!!!!! "there is no need to earn approval, no need to prove yourself" C.J. Mahaney states, "God is glorified when we believe with all our hearts that those who trust in Christ can never be condemned". How wonderful and encouraging to read this.
And this love that Jesus had for us - that he died in our place before we had any good in us, when we were at our worst state before we did anything "good" - never changes, he has died and that will not change. He died for me - and that should give me confidence to take up my cross and follow him, to live in service to others and him, to be joyful and to praise him. Even in the mundane things that "us mothers" do daily. Cooking for family, cleaning, laundry, dressing toddlers, correcting/disciplining toddlers, helping neighbors and people we run into regularly - All of it needs to be seen through the lens of "the Cross".

I loved this chapter that we read. It was wonderful to meditate on. I pray that I never stray from the cross. I pray that it will often be in my mind and on my lips, that I will relish in the Cross and what that means for me, and then in turn my actions will also show that.

Linking up with

Fall???!? I don't think so

2011-10-03T13:48:00.000-06:00

Fall is my favorite time of year. (but I think it's a lot of people's favorite). The change of cool air from the hot summer. The colors, the flavors, the smells, the food - everything it's just perfect. I love wearing jeans and sweatshirts. I love being cold at night. I love the fresh air outside. I could literally go on and on with how much I like Fall.

This year has been really weird, even for CO. It's been over 80 for more than week now. It's Oct 3rd and I'm in shorts and t-shirt and it's so hot outside. i cannot believe it. The nights are getting cool, so that helps, but I just can't believe how warm it is. I know it's like over 10 degrees over the norm which is crazy!

So needless to say - I don't feel ready for fall at all. I read other's on FB stating how much they are cozy in their house, what they are cooking and how good it smells, candles, leaves and crafts all revolving around Fall! I have not even started that mind set yet. I'm afraid it will rush right into winter and I won't even get to enjoy all these things that I love.

So despite the temperature - we tried some things. Now don't get all comparing to me and how great of a mom I am (b/c that's exactly what I would do, compare and feel guilty) - this is not normal, I am not crafty nor do I have good ideas. This is not the norm, although i wish it was. Most days we sit around with me trying to figure out how to entertain these boys. I know Carson needs more "purposeful activities" at his age and this has scared me a lot. I would just as soon play outside at the park every single day - but I know this will help him. So I tried something with leaves, and pine cones and berries from the trees around our neighborhood. I guess it was fine. He more wanted me to draw trains (remember the notsocrafty factor?yeah, not pretty, I can't draw either) and trace his hands. But hey - whatever. Maybe I'll look on pintrest for more things. :)

Another thing this crazy weather has caused is the boy's room to blow up. Some nights are chilly, some days they need pants, other days it's so hot they are in tank tops and shorts. Their dressers are not big enough for everything, so i have piles and piles and piles of the next season and sizes and am just waiting for the weather to mellow out before I put it all away. (does anyone else have this issue? i never know what to do besides have a mess for a long time)

I'm not necessarily complaining at all either! We have taken full advantage of the SUPER sunny days, long mornings at the park and picnics, walks outside and just enjoying tons and tons of sunshing. I LOVE SUNSHINE. I know come winter in this small apartment I will be longing for days like this. So we are soaking them in fully. But it just makes it seem weird that it's already October

yeah - this happens very frequently
Poor Landon

Happy Happy Boys

Boy, do I have a busy october too! I cannot wait for all the different activities we have on the calendar. Stay posted to hear all about them!

National "what" day

2011-09-29T14:47:00.000-06:00

yeah, i refuse to call it national coffee day b/c I have not found one "deal" in the town of fort collins. Probably

the biggest complaint I have with this place.

There is no krispy creme, cariboi coffee or dunkin Donuts around here!!!! And they seem to be the only places offering a deal. :( There is only starbucks and Panera and they don't seem to even realize it's National coffee day!

Yeah, so you guessed it - I LOVE COFFEE. Go ahead and judge all you out there who are against it and who think it's bad for you, and even you who think its sinful. It doesn't bother me that much. :)

I have been drinking it since I was 2 yrs old. Just part of the Culture in Ecuador. But since I've been "americanized" I drink it totally different now. I'll drink it anyway you please. Black, with cream, latte's, iced, hot - you name it, I'll drink it. (but I prefer black if it's hot, and DD's if it's iced)

Again - judge if you want - but the other day I realized I drank a whole pot of coffee ALL BY MYSELF (except for a tiny mug that Richard got before he left for work). Now that I admit is a little bad. If it's there, I'll drink it. Now that it's cooler out, I feel myself wanting to drink it all the time.

It's one of the first things I think of when i get up! I go to bed in anticipation for that warm cup of wonderfulness in the AM.

I don't think it gives me a buzz or helps me feel like I have more energy, I just love drinking it. I love the experience of holding this warm mug filled with goodness, I love the coffee shop atmosphere, I love meeting friends over coffee. I love feeling chilly and drinking a wonderful cup of coffee with my husband. (I"m so glad he likes it too)

So Happy National Coffee day to everyone else who got a free one. I just drank a normal cup here at home. :) (still good though).

Why do I blog?

2011-09-27T17:01:00.000-06:00

Recently I've started getting comments about my blog - and I'm constantly surprised at how many people read my blog that I would never even dream of - mostly b/c it's hard for me to imagine anyone besides the grandmother's would be interested in what I write. I've never considered myself a "writer" at all!!!!!! I'm not very creative AT ALL! So it got me thinking - 1.why do I blog? And 2. what do I want to accomplish with my blog?
I LOVE blogging! Let's just start with that. I have become enamored with other women's blogs that I've come across. Mostly all mothers but all in different walks of life. Different amount of kids, some working, some staying at home, some believers, some not, some I know and others I don't know personally. And I find it so very interesting to read about their lives. I love to see how the express themselves and their creativity. (ps. I always think I'm not good enough to be like them b/c I do not write like them). But in looking to other's blogs I became inspired.

You see - MY blog is where I can say anything without being interrupted! I can get my whole point across and tell the entire story without getting cut off due to some of life's interruptions. (b/c let's face it - what mother can have a conversation with someone else while kids are present and not have interruptions???) I can tell what part I want to tell. I can write about my kids and what they are doing. My family - who is all very far away from me- can keep up with my life - It's a way to communicate with them effectively. I can also share my heart and what I'm learning and how I'm growing as a woman and as a follower of Christ. I can share how I'm being changed through God's grace. I'm learning to love, I'm learning to show love, I'm learning to share God's love through my life.

I'm like my mother in the way that I love communication of any form - but mostly letters, emails, FB comments or even comments on my blog. I love interaction in this way - and maybe for me it's because this is mostly the biggest way I communicate with my family. (b/c my parents are overseas) That's not to say that I absolutely love talking in person or over the phone. I just like socializing in general - whatever form it may be. I need it!!

I never want to portray to the world that I am perfect or that I have everything figured out! But i do want other's to see the satisfaction child-bearing and being a mom can bring. God designed it to be that way! I myself am learning how to Live a "Gospel Centered" life in my mundane, monotonous, seemingly trivial happenings of the day. I'm learning that "there is now No CONDEMNATION" b/c God has saved me through giving his Son, and that affects EVERY aspect of my life. Even wiping snotty noses, or dealing with tantrums from a 2 yr old, or teaching a 1 yr old to walk, or making another pbj sandwich. I fail OFTEN in acting on what I say I believe as far as God being good all the time, and showing unselfish love to my sons or my husband, but I"M LEARNING. I'm learning what it means to love my neighbors but keep a balanced life at home! I'm learning how to give everything I have (time, money, energy and resources) but also keep my family healthy and stable and thriving. It's a challenge that ALL mothers face.

I blog to share my heart. I blog to maybe in some way encourage someone else. I blog to satisfy that "communication" longing in my heart, and because I like it! I've fought the fear in my head of "what will people think?" "Do they think I'm dumb?" "do they think I'm always on the computer?" "do they think I don't get anything else done?" "will people criticize this?" But you know - I write for my family! I write to hopefully be a light shining for God and bring glory to Him in this way, by sharing what I'm learning and experiencing. My hope is that I share the reality of motherhood, but also the joy of motherhood and the blessing it can be.

and lastly - since our newest endeavor - I want to share how God leads us, and provides for us, and guides us and takes care of us in our new move to Fort Collins, CO.

So there you go, take it or leave it. :)

Linking up with

and Linking up with

This one's for the Grandmas

2011-09-25T16:17:00.002-06:00

One difference I've noticed about Landon is that he loves to sit and try to figure things out! he plays with this toy for a long time, and gets so happy when he figures out how to put the rings on. He already tries to put his shoes on. (Carson is no where near trying to dress himself or put his shoes on himself) Landon is just very thoughtful and patient. i loved watching him play with this toy.

He also has officially has started walking. Although I'm always amazed at how slow the process is to go from crawling all the time to walking all the time. but last night we caught his first steps on video. it's so fun to see them in this stage. and to watch them grow and learn.

Although my days are far from a "bed of roses" with these two boys; they are full of "spunk" and keep me always hoppin'; and I am often battling frustration and lack of patience with my "ever-talking" 2 and half year old - There is just something in my heart that gives me fulfillment and satisfaction in being the mother to these 2 boys, in the responsibility of raising them and providing for their needs. There is such complete love and joy when I see them learn and grow.

A Day In Boulder

2011-09-24T19:41:00.002-06:00

Today was the Fall Festival in Boulder Colorado. Boulder is known for it's eccentric and unique people. (they were passing around petitions to sign to legalize marijuana :) ) and those "types" of people were everywhere. (sorry for the huge stereo type)

Anyways - they have a farmer's market every Saturday. This was nothing like I had seen in PA. So fun to walk around. All the produce was local and organic and looked absolutely beautiful. They had samples of tons of stuff. Great Local coffee bean stand with amazing coffee. great Hummus stand that was amazing (we actually caught them as they were closing and got 2 containers for a dollar cheaper than original price -$3 for a tub of all natural, vegan, and gluten free hummus), great food vendors. Everything was so fun to walk around and experience.

We stopped for lunch on a shady grassy area -

If you have spent more than 20 min
with this little boy -
you would know he LOVES sandwiches!!!!

They also had a little station of Free Bubble Fun! Carson loved this!

Of Course Richard and I enjoyed great food! Great Pork/Corn Tamales, they were awesome. Then we had tacos from another vendor that were so good! There was plenty of things to choose from that we would've have loved to try. But we always usually settle with Mexican. Next time we'd love to try the potstickers and bbq.

Carson

Landon

Carson was enthralled with
the man juggling Flames

What a perfect way to spend our first weekend employed. We just kept saying the whole way home to each other - "What a nice way to spend a saturday". We love to spend time together doing things outside in the beautiful Colorado air! We love to watch our boys experience things and enjoy the sights and sounds.

We love to see them smile!

And

SMILE THEY DID!

Recreation

2011-09-22T14:27:00.000-06:00

We moved from a 3 bedroom house with a basement, fenced in yard, and garage TO a 2 bedroom apartment in a complex on the 3rd floor.

Can you say Downsize?????

Needless to say - I was worried about the activity/energy level of my 2 active little boys. I was spoiled letting Carson out the back door to run around in the yard when he had a lot of extra energy. One of the things that I just didn't know what I was going to do is how to keep my active boys- active and not resort to TV all day long to keep him calm. (b/c let's face it, that's usually the only time my 2 yr old sits still and that's not even a guarantee)

One of the things that I am LOVING about Fort Collins is the many, many parks available. Today we just walked about a mile to this wonderful small park and had our lunch and played in the sand and slides for about 2 hrs!!!!

Fort Collins is filled with tons of grassy areas with benches and picnic tables. Places to walk dogs, to let little boys run wild. The parks are very well maintained. There is one park here so BIG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It has EVERYTHING imaginable (even a splash park in the warm weather)! Carson LOVES it! We could go to a park every day and my boys would be happy. And we almost have!

And it's almost always sunny her Colorado! I'm told the winters aren't even that bad. It can be cold and snowy one day but be nicer and sunny the next and tolerable to be outside.

It's amazing how much a walk and a little sunshine can help a mother's heart!

(and also makes whiny, cranky boys - happy)

Caught him mid sentence - oh wait! When is this
kid not in mid sentence?!?!?!?!
he talks literally NON-STOP

Chocolatey Raspberry Crumb bars

2011-09-21T14:54:00.003-06:00

I wish I had a cool wordless Wednesday photo to post today! I wish that I was a better photographer and that I could take cool creative pictures. but alas, I cannot! I just admire other people's pictures!

So instead today I'm linking up with

I have been thinking all day about what to post too!
But frankly - nothing of interest has happened lately. We are in a routine. Richard works throughout the day, the boys and I stay home and besides going the park, eating, playing, and "teachable" moments there isn't much to talk about! Some days I'm exploding with things to blog about and other days I'm racking my brain trying to come up with something creative!

I've been doing a lot of baking lately - since the house isn't screaming humid or hot anymore, b/c FALL is here! I love this time of year. I think I cook/bake better in the fall! :) I told Richard that the other day! I just enjoy it more and put more effort into it b/c I'm not sweating my brains out all day! :)
So I will post a recipe of these wonderful Chocolatey Raspberry Crumb Bars

Ingredients

1 cup (2 sticks) butter or margarine, softened
2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 cup packed light brown sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 cups (12-ounce package) NESTLÉ® TOLL HOUSE® Semi-Sweet Chocolate Morsels,divided
1 can (14 ounces) NESTLÉ® CARNATION® Sweetened Condensed Milk
1/2 cup chopped nuts (optional)
1/3 cup seedless raspberry jam

Directions

PREHEAT oven to 350° F. Grease 13 x 9-inch baking pan.

BEAT butter in large mixer bowl until creamy. Beat in flour, sugar and salt until crumbly. With floured fingers, press 1 3/4 cups crumb mixture onto bottom of prepared baking pan; reserve remaining mixture.

BAKE for 10 to 12 minutes or until edges are golden brown.

MICROWAVE 1 cup morsels and sweetened condensed milk in medium, uncovered, microwave-safe bowl on HIGH (100%) power for 1 minute;STIR. Morsels may retain some of their original shape. If necessary, microwave at additional 10- to 15-second intervals, stirring just until morsels are melted. Spread over hot crust.

STIR nuts into reserved crumb mixture; sprinkle over chocolate filling. Drop teaspoonfuls of raspberry jam over crumb mixture. Sprinkle with remainingmorsels.

BAKE for 25 to 30 minutes or until center is set. Cool completely in pan on wire rack.

They are so good! AWESOME i might even say!

I hope that you all go and try them!

I just had one during nap time with a cup of coffee and I could probably go and eat the entire pan!

God Provides

2011-09-19T14:41:00.001-06:00

Packing went relatively smoothly, drive across the county alsowent pretty smoothly. Unpacking and getting organized went superfast!!!!!!!!!!!! Integration in church has been so encouraging and so much fun!The only thing left was to have an income. It's something we wanted to happenfast - but knew it could potentially be a long long time. But we were hopeful.And now. . . .

I am so happy to announce that Richard has started his first day at a new employment. We could not be happier about this. He will be working for the company above, and if you click on it - feel free to visit website, and if you life in Fort Collins - Give them some business. :)hahahaha

When we first got into the area Richard went hard core looking for jobs. he searched the internet ALL DAY long. He sent his resume/recommendation letter to any job listed on the internet for Fort Collins that he even remotely felt qualified for or thought he would enjoy. After the first day or two of doing that, he started getting call backs and even got a few interviews lined up. We were so optimistic about him getting employed really fast. After not hearing back from the interviews or people telling him they would give him a call back and then never actually calling him back - we decided to go another route. (mostly b/c he needed to be making some money really soon)

You see - he is very qualified in restration/construction/water/fire damage "stuff". He has done that for 5 yrs now (our whole married life) and has a great resume for that line of work. We were hoping to maybe get out of that "line of work" b/c it tends to not provide benefits for families, in not a set schedule due to the emergency response factor, and can be hard on him physically. But we also realized - Richard would never be "happy" working in an office taking/making phone calls to people about their credit card or whatever. Or working as a furniture salesman. So those type of jobs weren't too much of an option. He also could start at a slightly higher rate due to the experience and work ethic he has, with a recommendation letter to prove it.

So the next stop was contacting any restoration company in Fort Collins area and just out of the blue sending them his resume/recommendation letter explaining he was looking for work. This my friends proved very encouraging. he started getting calls/emails immediately. He had about 3 or 4 interviews with different companies. Then last Friday out of the blue he received a call from Action. This man just had one job he was wondering if Richard was interested in helping him do, and not a full time position. But after talking - really watned to hire Richard. So to make this long story somewhat short - I will say, Friday night the man offered him a job - with decent pay, but with compensation for working after hours on emergencies and also a percentage of the restoration jobs that Richard does. Richard will be "in charge" of/and for right now, sole worker in this part of the company. Therefore - if company thrives and gets more jobs - Richard has the potential of being a "high up" person in the company. It will give him purpose and gratification in his job - knowing he's working for a purpose and not just doing what some random person tells him to do. I know that he will THRIVE at this job!!! He will help this man's company so much - and from what Iunderstand - this man and Richard will be perfect for each other.

So - we are thrilled. We are thankful. We are very excited aboutthis new journey. Only time will tell how things actually play out - but we areexcited about it. i get teary every time I think about God's mercies to us inhow smoothly he has allowed this transition to be. Although it's not alwaysbeen emotionally easy for me - we can totally see God's hand leading/guidingus. And I hope you can too!

Now today embarks our "life" here in Fort Collins.

Today - I am home by myself in our apartment without Richardhelping with the boys.

Today - I packed Richard's lunch in our new kitchen for the firsttime.

Today I will have supper ready for our family when he comes homefrom work!

Todaymy friends - is a good day!

10 Random Friday Thoughts

2011-09-16T15:16:00.003-06:00

1. Look at this road. This is our Road right outside our apartment complex.Look at how wide it is!!!! There is a car lane and a bike lane and a parking lane on BOTH sides of this yellow line. Now this road is no more "important" to the city that the road we moved from in PA but it is like 5 x's the size/width. I'm not being one ounce sarcastic here either!!!! That is one of the biggest difference here in Fort Collins. The Roads are SO WIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2. Boys love to throw rocks in water -

3. This lake/reservoir is like literally 15-20 min from our house and so perfect to go to

4. I absolutely find satisfaction in being the mother of this family!!!!!

5. Landon is standing all by himself often, but has no intention of taking a step yet

6. Like father- like son! They could've both thrown rocks into the water all day long!

7. Carson loved looking for grasshoppers and hopping next to them as they hopped away from him! (did I mention this place is plagued with grasshoppers????)

Landon was really tired at the end of our little
adventure

8. The people are so nice here (I think I've mentioned that before too)- at the bank when I walked in, there was a greeter who actually filled out a deposit slip for me! Almost a little too nice!!!!!!

9. We hope that Richard will start working next week for one of two companies that are interested in him! I'll be sure to update as we find out!
10. Did you notice my cool new birthday running shorts :) I wish I could wear them every day!

And a ps b/c I just wanted to add - we are really enjoying all this family time together. As stressed or "weird" it is to wait for a job to fall into place - we are spoiled to have Richard will us all day every day (except when he's at a job interview or a meeting of some kind for the church) and I say every day - we really need to just relax and enjoy this together as a family in Colorado - b/c in about 6 months we will be longing for this again!

7 Months - remember this series?

2011-09-15T09:48:00.000-06:00

Remember this series? yeah, the one where I was waking up early and keeping track of how long I've been doing it, and keeping myself accountable? I bet you thought I gave up on it! Nope I remembered and it's actually been on my mind a lot. The last time I posted was 5 months and we were getting ready to move. 6 months came and went, and the 15th (which is the day that I always post) happened to be the day that we drove like 17 hrs in separate vehicles with all our belongings and 2 boys. :) So needless to say, I didn't post that month.

Since then it's been pretty rocky. I'll just be honest and say that I haven't been very good at getting up before the boys the last month or more. :( With Richard not working, there is no reason to run before he leaves, there is no reason to get up early, b/c I don't have that much on my plate so our mornings have been SLOW to say the least. (which is very nice and I'm not complaining). I am a creature of routine and schedules and so even though this little "vacation" has been welcomed in our household we are all ready to get back into the swing of things.
I have been trying to wake up earlier than the boys, and they seem to be purposefully waking each other up the second my bible falls open. :( After hitting the snooze button like 5 times, then getting up and just hoping that this is the morning my boys will sleep until 7:15AM - I've learned that it's probably not going to happen.

So this post is a "get-on-track" post. This week I've been trying to get up early, but today starts the day. I will not hit the snooze button a million times and just plan on boys getting up early. So I need to get up before them. I hope by 8 months I will be able to report to you that -1. Richard has a job and we are in a routine and 2. I am having that much needed quiet time with my Savior and his Word.

I'm not doing this b/c I feel like it makes me "holier" or a better Christian. I'm doing it b/c I know I need it. If I don't set aside this time in the morning I will go all day with no communion with my God. No reading of his word to me, and no time to pray and talk with him. That's just how I am, and I know that's how I am. You might be different. I'm also trying to remember to keep my relationship with him going throughout the day and not just in the morning. But when i get up and refocus my head, drink a cup of coffee and get mentally prepared for the day - My family is much better off!

How have you been doing? let's hope we can make it through the first year together. :) if you haven't kept up with this, there's no better time to start the discipline than now - with me and my new life. :)

September Project marriage

2011-09-13T15:16:00.001-06:00

I missed being a part of the August Project Marriage mostly b/c we were moving, and the challenge had to do with making your bedroom a haven, and doing something special in the area of decoration or cleaning. Well first of all, we were moving, second of all, we got rid of our bed due to -shhhhhhhhhh don't tell anyone- bed bugs, and thirdly i just plain old didnt' do anything different, new or exciting to our bedroom. :( And we are still sleeping on the floor, maybe that's more romantic, that's what we're trying to pretend.

Anyways - September's challenge is to post a picture of us Then and Now. That's fun! I love looking through old pictures, but there are so many to choose from - so I might put a few more than one of each time frame. :) It's funny to see that even in less than 5 short years we have changed so much.

Then

Spring break Senior
year of College

Summer '06 Engaged

1st year of marriage
Backpacking/camping

NOW

Weekend Getaway after
weaning Baby #2

Date Night

Just a couple of weeks ago
now we're are Coloradoan Residents

We have changed in our physical appearance, but most of all in our love for each other. It's fun to look back at the old pictures and reminisce about how carefree and loving-life we were back then. But i wouldn't trade it at all for the maturity and joy that we have now. The comfortableness that we have with each other now is irreplaceable. After going through births, breastfeeding, sleepless nights, life changing decisions and trusting in God together as a couple our love for each other is strong and mature. We still love each other to pieces. I see his unfailing forgiveness to me and his unchanging love and that makes me feel secure. He is wise and leads me and our family. We are responsible adults now and we can't be as carefree as we were before - but I wouldn't change it for the world. Sure we have our hard days with each other and we don't always "like" each other. he frustrates me and I frustrate him sometimes. But we are committed and look forward to the rest of our lives together. i wonder how we'll look in 5 more years. :)

I'm growing

2011-09-11T21:45:00.002-06:00

I've been debating what to write for a while regarding this issue. I want to be honest with people but at the same time I would hate for someone to take me the wrong way, think I'm depressed, or that I just think my life is so hard when in reality I am blessed. So I've been debating. I sincerely hope this comes across the right way . . .

This week we had the opportunity to tell the story of how we got here in detail to a man in our church who came for supper one night. I again was reminded of just how awesome it is to see God working out details and leading/guiding us in our journey to The Crossing. From Richard not getting a job at the seminary, to work slowing down, to being able to graduate with a Masters, to our trip to CO and being able to attend the Conference in in Fort Collins in June, to randomly coming in contact with Gary Mcquinn (pastor at The Crossing), to truck breaking down, to bed bugs kicking us out of PA (yes, we had bed bugs in the last apartment and I neglected writing about it for fear of everything thinking we were gross, maybe I will have to write about it another time, and we don't think we brought them with us, at least not yet), and I'm sure there are few more things that I forgot - it is SO CLEAR to us that God brought us here! Even in details like books Richard had read and how God was moving in our hearts and minds and challenging us, but also showing himself faithful with answering our questions and evidently guiding our paths. All of these things are such an encouragement to me, and I have to constantly remind myself of all these things and think on Truth.

We could not be more content in this church. (not to say we didn't love the church we moved from, but again, God has a purpose for everything). Since we've gotten here it's been amazing to see how perfect the timing is for the church itself of us coming. They are growing so fast, and need help and we are wanting to be helpers. The Crossing is so refreshing - they are growing and desiring so much to preach the gospel to the people who need it, to show the love of Christ to everyone and they are doing it, the church is growing. The leadership has purpose and goals and they are lovingly guiding their flock. They are forming "community" with each other as a church body - but also reaching out to the unsaved. And it is amazing! They just started Life Groups (small groups) and we have been so encouraged by it, and look forward to finding our group of close believers to walk through this life together. They also, this Saturday, just launched their first ever Leadership training program called Porterbrook. A great "curriculum" that teaches theology so practically, and Richard and I both have the privilege of attending and growing and being challenged with that and we are excited, the Leadership of the church is excited and the Church body is excited! It's exciting times right now. (did I use the word "exciting" enough in that paragraph - do you get my drift? )

But it's not been without it's emotional difficulty and this is where I hope I'm not misunderstood. I had good friends in PA, friends that I will cherish forever! I was comfortable in PA and my boys were comfortable and they had friends. Richard had a job and we were making it every month financially. We had routine and a "normal" life. We were busy with things - but we were comfortable.
Now I wake up each morning with "nothing to do", in a sense. What is my purpose? Who will my friends be? My boys are adjusting well, but it's not been without their struggles. It breaks my heart to hear Carson ask for his friends and cousins. And he doesn't understand when I say they are too far away. ( I know he will be fine, but it still breaks my heart). They have had their days of crankiness that can be attributed to being uprooted. I hear/see my friends moving on with their lives while I feel like I'm at a standstill. That is hard for me to be "ok" with. I crave for that sweet friendship again. I want to understand these people and I want them to understand me - but I'm not there yet. As a woman I think this is all normal. I don't know where my place is right now. . .
It's easy to worry about how we are going to make it, to worry how we will pay rent next month, to wonder how long it will be before Richard is working.
We don't have a daily routine and I can sense that. I am a creature of habit - and we don't have a habit developed yet. Richard is awkwardly home all day. (I know there are many out there that would give anything in the world for that, so I'm not complaining about that at all!) but it causes tension when he wants/needs to be providing for us. We are at the hands of someone else who is supposed to call us back. This is hard for me to handle all the time.
I can be completely fine with it most of the time, and be trusting God a lot of the time - but I'm human and sometimes i worry. sometimes I get selfish and want people to reach out to me or get feeling sorry for myself and think no one likes me. Maybe yesterday was my breaking point and that's why I feel the need to write this out.

Tonight we were at a small group - and we heard the testimony of an elderly couple and their journey through life and how God has been faithful to them and how excited they are about "living life" with us and helping us and encouraging us to walk closer with God (us meaning the whole group). How refreshing for me! How wonderful to put my life into perspective. God is making history with me, and this time in my life is only a period. It won't be forever and we will have a story to tell others one day of God's faithfulness to us. you've heard me say this before and I will say it again "everything in my life is here to teach me patience" and this season in life is no exception. God is shaping me and I am thankful for that, I am growing and that's right where I'm supposed to be.

There is probably so much more I could keep writing about - but it is already too long and most of you have probably not even read this far in the post. So I will just end it - but leave you with these verse that I've tried to meditate on throughout the days when my mind wants to focus on my "hardships".

Psalm 27:13-14 "I am still confident of this; I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.
Psalm 28:7 "The LORD is my strength, and my shield; my heart trusts in Him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song"

Coming to terms

2011-09-09T15:14:00.002-06:00

Are you tired of me counting days and weeks and years??? hahahaha - I just realize most of my posts have to do with counting how many days until or how many days since (or weeks or months or years). this my friends is largely due to my mother and her mother. :) Keeping track of time and always remembering dates and always talking about the past or looking forward to events in the future. this my friends, is my nature so I will always do this. (but I might add - I'm no where near as good at it as my mother is, but I think I'm getting better at it as I get older)

Today marks 3 weeks since we showed up in Fort Collins, in fact as I look down at the time on the computer it is EXACTLY 3 weeks!!!!!

You know what that means, my friends??????
3 weeks and exactly 5 days since my last

Dunkin Donuts French Vanilla Iced Coffee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And I'm trying to come to terms with it - I miss them dearly. There are no Dunkin Donuts in sight for miles and miles and miles and miles. :( Mostly I miss having such an affordable drink to buy. There's just something about heading out to run errands and being able to buy a drink and sip it. Does anyone else like that?

It hasn't been too hard saying good bye to my beloved drink, but I do miss sipping that great refreshing drink.

They do have plenty of Starbucks, but it's hard for me to dish out $2 for a tiny tiny drink and it just isn't the same. Mind you - I do enjoy a good coffee from Starbucks - but can't compare to the DD's iced coffee mostly when it comes to price. (hot coffee is a whole other ball game my friends, I'm a lot snobbier when it comes to that)

Friends - I am surviving and still enjoy life even without my drink. :)

Day in the life of a One year old

2011-09-08T21:51:00.001-06:00

Ok - I promise - last post reminiscing about a year ago. :) i just cannot believe that we made it through one year. I can't believe it went so fast, i can't believe how healthy Landon is, and I can't believe God gave him to us. I'm so thankful God chose to put him in this family and he adds such a fun dynamic. He cuddles with me all the time! I love it so much. he wraps his arms around me and lays his head down on my shoulder. I just can't get enough of it!!! i also caught him standing on his own today - so it won't be long before we have 2 boys running all around here. Happy birthday Landon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So what does a 1 year old baby do on his birthday? you might ask - well I'm here to tell you. Get ready for some excitement. :) Just kidding - we didn't do anything b/c we celebrated last weekend, and you can read about that here.

He looks so tired in the picture b/c he was sleeping so hard!

Just waking up on his birthday! cuddling with daddy on the couch!

I celebrated my birthday by sleeping until almost 8 AM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (this my friends is a very rare phenomenon) I had been up super late the night before and then was awake at 5 am for some reason, but went right back to sleep and slept for a long time. (and yes in case you're wondering he slept in this polo. We got in late the night before and we just put him straight in bed, call us lazy - but it works for us)

Breakfast was banana and kix

followed by some play time with daddy!

followed by some play time outside with Mommy on the local Tennis courts. Tearing up my knees chasing the ball around. :)

Cool crack on the tennis courts ;)

Followed by a short nap
Then lunch - grapes, yogurt, pbj, graham crackers and cheese, and milk. (this kid eats a lot)
Followed by a VERY LONG NAP - that mom and dad were so thankful for.

After naps we took a ride to the park! I'm so cute in the car and always smile when my parents look back at me.

I could swing all day long - what a great way to spend a birthday!

Mommy really loves me and loves spending time with me!

After the park - I ate supper - Waffles, peaches and Carrots and milk.
Then we went to a small group and met some wonderful people who all loved seeing me smile and spend my birthday evening with me. I went to bed late - but that's ok. It's my birthday. :)
Now I have to wait a whole year before I can celebrate again - I hope it goes as fast as this year did - but mommy wants it to slow down. :)

Trail Run

2011-09-07T07:59:00.000-06:00

Last night I ventured into something that I never thought I would do. You see - I run a few times a week; on average about 4 miles at a time. I like and enjoy it and want to push myself to do more - I almost consider myself a runner (well not after tonight).

I've always wanted to join a "running group/club" to run with people for fun and gain acquaintances and make running a little more enjoyable. So as soon as we got here I started trying to find a group online to run with. I ran across a group called Fort Collins Trail Runners. I looked at it, then I contacted the "leader" and made sure it was a legitimate thing and not someone trying to prey on women. They meet on tues and thurs nights and do trail runs. Tuesday's run seemed doable to me - just shy of 4 miles (which I run 4 miles often throughout the week, so no big deal, right?). They say over and over - all levels welcome. It's just a social pleasure run.

Yesterday was the first day I could go. I've been in the midst of potty training (which by the way is going pretty well just exhausting) and Richard thought it would be good for me to go meet some new people and enjoy a run.
Well let me tell you - TRAIL RUNNING IS SUPER HARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So different than Flat land running! The first half mile I was going to die and I was seconds away from just turning around and going back to my car and never seeing those people again. My lungs were burning up, I thought I was going to pass out! It's so much different running up hill on a trail that is rocky and switch back and steep.
Then to make things worse - these people are hardcore runners. Like the woman leading this trail run, runs about 100 miles a week. Like the lead guy has done a 100 mile race. Like the nice girl who stayed back with me near the end is training for a 50 mile race, like they've done multiple marathons!!!!!!!!!!! What was I thinking????????????????
I made it through the whole trail, I walked a lot on the up hills, they were so nice to me about it all and even told me I should come back out! (and some of them walked too) That this was a faster group b/c of the rain, that usually there are slower ones who come out and run. In the end I'm glad I went. It pushed me harder than i wanted to be pushed, it challenged me to step way out of my comfort zone to go and meet random people to run. And who knows - maybe you'll see me one day in the next 50 mile woman's race. :) ha just joking!!!!

And guess what I did when I got home - you guessed it - a big bowl of ice cream and brownies. :) I should sleep good tonight!
If you care to see pictures of the trail and how incredibly hard it was go HERE. and if you don't believe me it was hard!

One Year

2011-09-06T15:09:00.000-06:00

I've been waiting a whole year to be able to write a post like this. Knowing that it would be amazing to look back over a year and see how far we have come! Never in my wildest dreams would I have pictured us where we are.

Today in the midst of potty training and waiting to hear back about jobs I think back to a year ago! boy! have things changed for us! This is the last picture of me pregnant with Landon right at 34 Weeks! My water broke on Sept 5th. (landon was not due until Oct 14th. ) I had an aweful day at church wondering if things were ok b/c I just didn't feel right, I went to the triage room in the hospital and got checked out, but they confirmed it was not amniotic fluid and sent me home. I was home literally about an hour and my water really did break! That time I knew for sure. Panic struck me! I don't have anything ready! The house is a mess! i don't have baby clothes out! In fact I don't have ANYTHING out! I'm not ready! this cannot be happening. i stood in the shower sobbing on the phone to my sister not knowing what to do. As Richard ran around the house, calling his sister to come and get Carson, trying to get a few things together for the hospital stay! This isn't supposed to happen! I'm not ready AT ALL!!!!! How is the baby?!???? Will everything be ok with the baby???!!??. So many emotions that I was feeling.

Our stay in the hospital was long.(at least it felt long to me) Labor did not kick in right away and I was put on bed rest in the hospital with IV and antibiotics and talking with a lot of doctors. It was Labor day weekend then too so the normal doctors and U/S techs were not there. So we just waited. At that point my expectations of delivering naturally were slowly being changed assuming there was no way!
the next couple days were spent in a lot of prayer and begging God for wisdom for us and the doctors with the decisions that lay ahead. If you want to read the whole birth story go here. In short God allowed me to delivery naturally and I could not be more thankful for that!
Long story short - landon was born a healthy 6lbs and 9 oz!!!!!!!!!!!! For a six week premie that is very good.

This picture is not really meant to be seen by many - oh well
It is the first time I held him but only for like 30 sec before he was wisked
away - and then I had to wait more than a day to hold him again.

This is all I could do at the beginning to comfort him. I did not
even feed him for about 36 hrs

It was heart breaking to see him like this, but I knew it was helping him.

Slowly things progressed and more and more "equipment" was taken off of him. It was such a joy to watch him as he got more and more independent with his breathing and his eating.
He did experience a little Jaundice and this is mainly what kept him in the NICU for a longer period of time. (although it was only 6 days which is not very long at all compared to a lot of babies)

I was overjoyed when i could hold him and feed him as difficult as it was b/c he had a feeding tube in his nose still. But those first few times I held him in the rocking chair in the NICU were so precious.

Marks from the tape from feeding tube

We caught him chilling out in his Jaundice "tank"
He still lays like this a lot!

After 6 longs days we finally were able to come home! Not without much anxiousness and worry from me.

I stand in awe now looking back over the last year. Landon has grown to be a very healthy boy! He has caught up in all his developmental areas. He is one of the most pleasant babies I've ever seen. I am truly blessed. A year ago - we were sitting in the hospital wondering and worrying about what our new life would hold. Now today we are sitting in Fort Collins in our new apartment, in a new city, with 2 healthy boys, potty training the older one, and teaching Landon to drink milk from a cup! We don't have a "community" around us yet, but we are building one slowly in Fort Collins. I can't believe how much has changed in our lives over the past year.

Richard and I are closer than we were a year ago, b/c of what we experienced together. We grew in our knowledge of God's love for us, and the blessing of having a church body to care for us. Looking back at how God has lead us down the road we are now on - it's amazing. We are psyched to look ahead at what this next year holds for us! What changes will we experience this coming year?

And now this is our family! Landon celebrated his 1st year (although it's not until the 8th so expect one more "one year" post. hahahaha). and we are in colorado with a healthy family!

All New things

2011-09-05T21:43:00.002-06:00

Today I think I got a little too ambitious. Potty training has been one of the things that I have dreaded the most so far about parenting. I've watched as others have potty trained their kids. I've tried to talk to a few people about how/what they did. I talked to my sister, I learned about "potty training in a day" and just was not looking forward to it and felt like it was this huge goal that was soooo unattainable.
My original goal was to potty train this summer, then we decided to move across the country and thought I should probably wait until we get settled. Since we've been here I've gotten to my breaking point with diapers for him, and I thought maybe he was ready. So last week we got a "potty seat" and one package of undies. This morning I just took out the potty and told him to sit there and "go on the potty" and we were started in it "ready or not". He didn't seem to mind and while he sat there watching tv and drinking and eating he seemed to be fine. he did go a few times. Then we had to run to the store, b/c I happened to be having company that night too. The realization that i just started this big project without really preparing mentally for it scared me to death. What do I do to go to the store? What do I do for nap time? What do I do for bedtime? What if he has accidents? WOW! it's pretty overwhelming to me not knowing how it really works.
Landon is also in a transition period. I decided to stop doing baby food and start figuring out "real" food for him. I cooked carrots and some mixed veggies and am cutting up fruit for him, and giving him milk in a sippy cup! He seems to be doing ok, but not great. I think he's sad he doesn't get his spoonfuls of food. he seems to be fighting me a little with it.

today I feel overwhelmed - missing friends, not knowing where I will fit in here, trying to potty train, trying to take care of my house and children, trying to not worry about a job, and craving social gatherings.

I'm not old - but one thing I've learned in my life is that everything is a phase. i need to be patient and relax about it. Kids always go through phases. Carson will eventually pee by himself. Landon will eventually eat normal food. I will eventually have close friends here. Richard will get a job. We will soon be busier than we want to be with people and church and community.

Claiming truth tonight and asking for patience to get through this introductory time in our lives. I know God loves me and is taking care of me. i know he will be glorified in me. Maybe I was a little too ambitious - but I've reached the point of no return. Tomorrow is another day.

P.S. I'm pleased with how potty training went today. He told me when he had to go all but one time today. he was using his little seat and excited about it. I want to be successful and be able to tell everyone I did it in one day and he got it. But i can't put those things on myself. he understands it, we will go at it again tomorrow. He will get it eventually - but I am pleased that he only had one accident today.

Pss - Company was great! Dinner tasted good. and we enjoyed visiting with new friends and getting to know them. I'm so glad they came over.

1st Birthday party

2011-09-03T17:48:00.000-06:00

When we decided to move the middle of August, one of the things that made me sad was that Landon was turning 1 year old soon and I could not do a party for him with our friends and cousins. Once we got here I realized i could invite family that could never attend one of our bday parties when we lived in PA. And we are so happy that we could celebrate together. So I planned a little get together with Richard's parents, grandparents and 2 of his siblings with their families. (although we really missed not having the cousins from PA to celebrate with us, and they will never be replaced).

He was not born until Sept 8th, but we did his party ahead of time so we could enjoy the family on the holiday weekend when it was a little more convenient for them to travel here. We had the get together in Denver at my brother in law's house. It was a lot of fun to be with family! It's funny the thought of doing a party for a baby who has "NO CLUE". So we excused it with celebrating "Nana's" bday (who happened to be born on the 8th also) and my birthday. We all got presents. :)

this is my birthday boy sitting on the "throne"

He's pretty close to walking

Carson with his great Grandpa

Cousins
These 2 are about 4 months apart - they look so much alike!

For food we had Taco salad with a lot of fixins', fruit, cupcakes

Just having moved to CO - we had to
a broncos theme

The kids played a lot in the backyard and had a great time together

Happy Birthday boy swinging

The "Cake Ceremony"

Singing "Happy Birthday"

He made a mess

The Loot

A nice winter Coat

This is him Saying "Thank You" to everyone in his own way

The train Track my mom bought him, that Carson has played with
the entire day! And gets mad when Landon touches it. ha

Happy Birthday

2011-09-01T06:28:00.000-06:00

Today is my 27th Birthday. But more importantly it's Jerelyn's birthday! We are twins and have always shared the same birthday our entire lives. My mother always made it special for both of us. When I was little I didn't like it so much, now that I'm an adult I realize how much of a blessing it is to share this with one of my best friends. She is a Great mother, a Great wife, a great Sister, a Great pastor's wife, and a Great Great friend. (we didn't always get along) We have grown so close of the last 4-5 years and I am honored to share her birthday with her. She is a great encouragement to me! She is a picture of patience and wisdom! I love that we both have 2 boys the same distance apart, so we always have stories to share with each other!
I wish you a wonderful birthday, Jerelyn. I hope you feel special! I hope you enjoy your day! Know that I'm thinking about you all day! And maybe for our 30th we can spend it together! :)

LOVE YA

A Piece of Spence Farm

2011-08-31T14:26:00.000-06:00

My grandfather owned a produce/flower/christmas tree Farm in Woburn MA. He had lots of land in Canada where he shipped his trees from, he sold lots of corn and tomatoes and had many green houses full of flowers. He had a building where he sold retail produce and plants. The parking lot was always well landscaped with lots of flowers. As a grandchild most of my highschool work experience was from working at "the farm". (not as much as the other grandchildren b/c I lived overseas, but whenever we were in the states, he was willing to give us work) Spence Farm is in the process of being sold off now. All the land is almost completely gone now. :( This makes all of the family a little sad. We all have such great fond memories of "the Farm" and it is leaving a legacy behind in the Boston area.
When I was visiting the Boston area in May 2010 my aunt said I should go over and take some perennials from the over gown parking lot, that once used to look so pretty. I was so happy to be able to take a little piece of Spence Farm with me back to Scranton.
I had a perfect place for them in my front yard by the sidewalk where there happened to be 2 big holes. I couldn't wait to plant them and watch them grow. Of course Richard reluctantly helped me dig the plants up from the parking lot area, then figured out how to store them in the trunk without getting the trunk too dirty, then helped me replant them in our front yard. (and that my friends is true love!!!) i was so happy. Little did I realize that we would be moving in about 15 months. I was wondering if they would even come back the next year or if they actually did survive the trip to Scranton. But spring came in 2011 and lo and behold my plants came back, blossoming and looking great! I was ECSTATIC!!!!
Then we decided to move! Then we decided to rent an apartment in an apartment complex! Then it happened to be 1700 miles away! how was I going to take the plants with me? Would they even survive? Where would I put them when I got here? So many questions . . . But I knew leaving them was dumb - then i was sure to not have them. I might as well try.
So after we packed the truck, I convinced Richard to dig them back up and put them in 5 gallon buckets with dirt and put them in the back of the truck. And at our stops, he even took them out of the truck so they could get a little bit of sun! :) (and once again, true LOVE)
By the time we got here they were looking pretty sad. :( As soon as we could we bought little planter bucket things and some more potting soil and replanted them. We do have a perfect little ledge for them where they get sun. They look terrible, and I'm afraid I will probably only have one, maybe two survive. I don't even know if they will come back b/c they are in pots. even though my family has a green thumb - i do not know that much about them. Wouldn't it be cool one day to plant them in my very own yard and always tell people that they are from my grandfather's farm!?!?!?!?! I hope they live . . .

really, lets be realistic - this one probably won't survive.
The only green you see, is Scranton grass/weeds growing strong

Among all those dead things in the bottom of the picture
I promise, there is little tiny new things springing up!
I hope its not grass!!!!! :(

I think this one might make it!

And I really hope this one does, it's the most promising

Anyone have any knowledge of whether they will survive in pots? I don't even know what they are. :( (my auntie terre might though) Should I really try to get them into the ground somewhere?